Enzo Williams' "The Escort" - 10 Amusing Things To Watch Out For

Yasmine Gomez (Lovi Poe) leaves behind waitressing to work as a receptionist for an escort service company. Little did Yassi realize that her boss Cyrus de los Reyes (Derek Ramsey) has plans of turning her into one of his high class prostitutes. One day, Yassi receives a proposal for a date-only transaction with business tycoon Gary Montenilla (Christopher de Leon). The “clean date”, that took several convincing, will earn her P50,000. Besotted by the lovely lass, Gary wants to pursue her further. To her surprise, her bank account earns a whopping P100,000. Now where do I sign up? Cyrus couldn’t be happier. After all, the good looking pimp's finances are fast dwindling. 

What Yassi didn't realize, Cyrus also peddles his flesh to long-time investor Lucy (Jean Garcia), a former actress who’s married to a powerful mayor (Rommel Padilla), due out for release from prison. As fate would have it, Cyrus begins to fall for virginal Yassi, a virtual prey in a sea of predators. Wouldn't you be surprised if this attraction weren't mutual? 

So Cyrus opens his heart and reveals to Yassi that this “greedy, egotistic asshole” cannot resist the “fresh, innocent and pure” heroine.

As the movie comes to its third part, Cyrus has to run away from the vengeful mayor, who learns of his wife's indiscretion. Cyrus is as good as minced meat, right? But Yassi strikes a deal with Gary who has the power to save our loverboy from impending doom. In turn, she is offered three options as payback. One, marry Gary and be provided with all the riches she can only dream of. Two, surrender herself for a night of pleasure in Gary’s boudoir. Three, and the more interesting proposition, make love to Cyrus - with Gary in the audience. Are we trapped in some EL James, Anais Nin, Christina Lauren or Jackie Collins paradise? Nah, more like a diluted Xerex.   

10 Things Why Watching "The Escort" is Amusing:

1. The film falls victim of its own contrivance. Early on, a voice over asks, “Lahat ba tayo may presyo?” To make sure we all understand the earth-shattering question, we’re put through a wringer by getting asked again, this time in English, “Does everything and everyone have a price?” Translation class? Clear?

2. Brenda (played with wanton vulgarity by Dimples Romana) takes her fee and waves the bills in front of a party crowd. Don’t you just love how suddenly this discreet industry is depicted with utter imprudence?

3. Yassi (Lovi Poe) rejects Cyrus’s proposal to join the escorting business. She’s repelled by the idea that she ignores a first invitation for a strictly dinner-only date with filthy rich Mr. Gary Montenilla (Christopher de Leon) though it would have earned her a cool P10,000. Cyrus lecherously badgers to pimp her up. But no go. She feels dishonoured; so humiliated in fact that she has taken every opportunity to join Cyrus for lunch and dinner. Isn’t she the smartest?

4. Everytime she meets up with Cyrus, former actress Lucy (Jean Garcia), wife of an embattled mayor (Rommel Padilla), refuses to do the dastardly deed on the bed. “Ang kama, para sa mag asawa,” she reasons. So it’s all jacuzzi, floor, kitchen table, and pebbly beaches? Kinky.

5. Cyrus argues it isn’t money that fuels the world, but lust. I had to rethink my existence to validate this preporterous theorizing. Do I work and earn my keep to satisfy my lust? Does Duterte sanction his bloody drug war out of lust? Does Bimby star in his dreadful TV commercials for lust? Does Sharon Cuneta shed a hundred pounds of lard for lust? Do the manangs in the market sell their tulya, pinya and kangkong to make errr kangkang? Ooops! Sorry I couldn't resist the rhyme. Tee hee. But good try, smart guy.

6. Derek Ramsay once again reveals his performing acumen in all its splendour. When Cyrus takes Yassi to Kandaya Resort in Daanbantay, Cebu for an overnight canoodling, he reveals to the blushing virgin that he is trying “hard” to resist her. He takes his eyeglasses off, then stares at Yassi. He gazes at her. Smoulder. Smoulder. Smoulder. And smoulder some more. Then I realized that all throughout the movie, Derek has been consistently smouldering. I was sure by the time credits were rolling, hot Derek would have been reduced into an ember.

7. The story reveals why Cyrus feels vulnerable inside a church, thus he avoids it. When he was 8 years old, his mother abandoned him inside. Then when he was about to get married, his bride left him for his best man. Sniff sniff. Cyrus’s voice cracks. “But I promise to change my life for you,” he says. Smoulder smoulder smoulder. Sniff sniff sniff. Yet everyone beside me in the cinema were struck with an unshakeable sensation of apathy. I am suddenly reminded of someone who can outsmoulder Derek Ramsay – Derek Zoolander! Hmmm. Check below if I am just fibbing.

Derek Zoolander and Derek Ramsay - Kings of Smoulder

8. Gary Montenilla takes Yassi home for the first time. He hasn’t even told her of his intentions, but he suddenly springs up a proposal… with a ring! Agad agad? Is it the end of the world na?

9. After Cyrus gets beaten up by the muscle men of Gold's Gym, errr, I mean those pesky, vengeful mayor’s thugs, he is seen on a hospital bed all contused and bloodied. A nurse auscultates his chest with a stethoscope. Then a doctor joins her and he blurts out, “Nurse, take him to the O.R.” No BP? No wound care? No intravenous fluid even to KVO? OR agad?

10. When Yassi goes to the cashier to pay P100,000, the girl tells her, “Ma’am, this is just for the professional fee .” Someone actually says that? No billing invoice itemizing service rendered? Just PF? Now which hospital is this?

If ten items weren’t enough, Enzo Williams' "The Escort" caps its droll sequence of events by following Cyrus sometime after the aforementioned incident (I remember 3 years but that can't be!) Cyrus has recuperated. He's been combing the metropolis looking for Yassi. But there’s no trace of her. To mend his broken heart, he decides to fly back to the Cebu resort where he once took Yassi. The night sea seemed quiet he could hear his own beating heart. He sits back, internalizes, and smoulders some more. Then something stirs from a nearby chair. Guess who?

#theescort   #lovipoe   #derekramsay

Chito Rono's Shake Rattle & Roll 14 The Invasion - Not So Scary Tales

PAMANA (Writer: Ricky Lee)

A mysterious uncle leaves a P20-million inheritance to four of his relatives whom he hasn’t seen in ages: Donald (Herbert Bautista) is a mild mannered former priest who’s financially hard up. Myra (Janice de Belen) is the intemperate business woman with abusive streaks to his husband’s son. Faye (Arlene Muhlach) is Myra’s congenial cousin. The fourth cousin is Tisoy aka Benedict Collins (Eri Neeman) who’s vaguely interested with his departed uncle’s wealth. The dead uncle was once a popular comic book writer who’s done well creating macabre characters.

Once summoned by their uncle’s lawyer, the cousins troop down to a ramshackle house that reeks with malevolence. But what's important is the departed's millions, right? Unfortunately, the big stash carries a catch: Paintings of the uncle’s cast of popular characters – the vampire Man de Nado (Fabio Ide), hair monster Filomena (Dimples Romana), the mother-killer Tiyanak and piano-playing Rosalda (Snooky Serna) - are distributed among the cousins. They have to keep them for a month – and if they survive, only then will they be able to get their share of the 20 million.

This condition isn’t as easy. The characters come to life and Tisoy, who dumped the painting in a garbage, becomes the first victim. The gang rush back to their uncle’s house, taking their family with them: Myra’s husband Benjie (Dennis Padilla), Benjie’s son Felimon (Gerald Pesigan), Faye’s daughters Cynthia (Empress Schuck) and Gladys (Anna Vicente), and Cynthia’s suitor Emerson (Ivan Dorschner). Once inside, doors shut and they find themselves trapped inside. What’s worse, the comic characters start to appear, wrecking havoc all around. And the only one to stop them was a fifth character, heart-eating Buboy, Ang Munting Diablo (Rain Papa). But why would Buboy help them when all he wants to do is play with his victims before consuming their hearts? Will the gang survive their uncle’s monsters?

LOST COMMAND (Writer: Rody Vera)

On cursory surveillance, a group of soldiers head into the dense jungle of Barangay Putotan. They’ve heard of the mysterious disappearance of folks and the wandering creatures that go bump in the night. Is the ragtag group of former soldiers responsible for this? The platoon soon begins to lose their men cryptically seized in the silhouettes of the woodland. With briskly dwindling numbers, Martin Barrientos (Dennis Trillo) decides to follow Linda (Ella Cruz), a blind girl, who takes them to her “Itay” (Ronnie Lazaro) said to be able to help them. What they find instead is more bewildering – former soldiers and comrades have turned into the undead, and they’re being recruited to be part of this group. With the help of Corporal Upaon (Paulo Avelino) who’s been fed the flesh of others and Private Conde (Martin Escudero) who steers the undead away from Barrientos, the platoon leader is taken by Linda's father to where he could jump to his freedom. “Kunin mo lang ang anak ko, at ilayo mo sya dito,” pleads Itay. But the jungle is treacherous and the path is long. What becomes of Barrientos?

UNWANTED (Writer: Roy Iglesias)

A catastrophic earthquake separates Hank (Vhong Navarro) from his pregnant girl friend Kate (Lovi Poe) who’s lost in the rubble. Upon gaining consciousness, two days after the incident, people are still trapped as they find their way out. Hank finds other survivors, Ming (Eula Caballero), Neil (Albie Casino), and their Uncle Tom (Eric Tai); there’s Rex (Carlo Aquino) and a loud gay man (Chokoleit). Each one eventually fall prey to the peculiar creatures similarly trapped in the rubble. When Hank finally finds Kate, they scamper out of the building, only to discover that the world they once knew had ceased to exist. Space ships hover in mid-air; dinosaur-like creatures saunter across them, and they’re approached by unidentifiable beings who soon take their semblance.

Director Chito Rono seems to be the perfect person to handle three disparate stories for the 14^th installment of the horror trilogy. In fact, there’s something nostalgic with the return of Janice de Belen, Arlene Muhlach and Herbert Bautista into the series since their first appearance 18 long years ago: Bautista for Peque Gallaga’s “Manananggal”, De Belen for her iconic role in Ishmael Bernal’s “Pridyider”, and Muhlach for Emmanuel H. Borlaza’s “Baso”. But while these three old tales were compelling to watch, Rono’s new age fables are emotionally distant and uninteresting. There’s nothing much in its exposition that draws you in. More importantly, the element of suspense is tepid, if non-existent.  

In a scene in “Pamana”, the group finds a spinning top in the middle of the room. Do you get: 1. Scared? 2. Perplexed? 3. Move away? Human instinct is basic, and when we’re accosted by something sinister, we either fight or “fly”. Instead, Janice and company stare and engage in a discussion. It was almost too funny. In both “Pamana” and “Unwanted”, Rono tried injecting humor - that both Myra and Faye got pregnant before getting married, for example, and there’s Vhong Navarro in “Unwanted” who refers to Chokoleit as “Di tiyak”. While Vhong is a brilliant comedian, fear and laughter are too unrelated, and fusion of both results into anything but harmonious. The end product: lukewarm exposition with an apocryphal emotional engagement. As an audience, we invest something into our viewing experience: Do we get sad and sympathize? Do we shiver in our knickers and shriek with fear? Do we laugh until we’re blue? Curiously, SSR 14 doesn’t induce any. We just didn’t care enough.

“Lost Command”, on the other hand, feels like a spiritless version of the Korean movie, “R-Point”, about a band of missing soldiers, presumed dead, who sends a radio transmission to their base. But while “R-Point” is relentlessly gripping, “Lost Command” is languid with characters almost unrecognizable from the next. It was mostly successful in gathering some of the hottest soldiers in the cinematic universe: Dennis Trillo, Martin Escudero, Paulo Avelino, Alex Castro, JC Tiuseco, AJ Dee, Kenneth Paul Salva, et.al. Then Rono renders them disposable. What a waste of masculine meat. Tee hee.

SRR 14 was Rated A by that dubious ratings group, Cinema Evaluations Board (CEB). Considering that this is actually one of the worst installments from the series speaks oodles about the capacity of the CEB to rate quality films. How much government money is being spent to maintain this useless arm? Heaven knows this group badly needs to be scrapped. 

Paulo Avelino, Dennis Trillo, and JC Tiuseco

Kate and Hank are in a quandary: she's pregnant!

Survivors: Eric Tai, Vhong Navaro, Eula Caballero & our favorite baby-maker Albie Casino.

Dead Korean soldiers come to life in "R-Point".

Erik Matti's Tiktik: The Aswang Chronicles - Visual Feast

Makoy (Dingdong Dantes) is an unemployed engineer who braves the craggy and tempestuous roads of a remote village to fetch Sonia (Lovi Poe), his pregnant partner who’s had enough of his arrogant ways. Upon Makoy’s arrival, Sonia refuses to see him. Fely (Janice de Belen), Sonia’s mother, is only too willing to drive him away. She would rather see Sonia raise her child alone than wed her off someone like Makoy who unwittingly finds an ally in mild mannered Nestor (Joey Marquez), his prospective father-in-law.

To find his way back to Sonia and Fely’s favor, Makoy volunteers to pay for swine that will be served as lechon for a birthday celebration. Nestor, along with oddball cousin Bart (Ramon Bautista), takes him to the market. Unfortunately, the rates aren't within his financial means. Bart recommends a slaughterhouse run by a nomadic people: “Sabihin n’yo lang pangalan ko, makakamura kayo.” The place, it turns out, is a side show of grim countenance where they encounter street smart kids who eventually offer them the merchandise at half the price. This becomes Makoy’s ticket to the dining table later that night. However, Sonia won’t budge. And Makoy is once again turned away. A man’s ego can only take so much.

Then Nestor starts hearing the peculiar sound that’s getting fainter by the second: “May aswang. Pag malakas ang tunog, malayo pa. Pag humihina, malapit na sila.” In the dark of night, Nestor gets a visitor – his Pareng Antonio and son Abel. Little did they know that the pig they bought has transformed into Kulot (RJ Salvador), the curly haired leader of the street urchins who sold them the pig. The swine monster comes after Sonia, but he gets killed in the heist. But their troubles aren't over yet. The slain monster's cohorts have assembled outside ready for carnage. Before long, Pareng Antonio is devoured like roadkill. More than anything, the hungry pack wants the child in Sonia’s womb. Meanwhile, the embattled family, alongside nosy neighbor Aling Pacing (Rina Reyes), braces to defend themselves – with asin (salt), bawang (garlic), buntot pagi (manta ray’s tail), methanol bombs and a bottle of lana (oil) that boils when tiktiks are nearby. Will Makoy, Sonia and their child survive the impending siege of these folkloric monsters?

Director Erik Matti’s “Tiktik: The Aswang Chronicles” is a sumptuous re-imagining of the “aswang” mythology, punctuated by visually succulent images filmed entirely before a “green screen”. With green screen, it's simple to superimpose anything or anyone into any shot. You can transport yourself to the moon, appear in your favorite film, or make a presentation along with all the relevant facts and figures. This is a ground breaking technological splendor in local cinema. I have never seen a film as gorgeous as this since Pedro Valdes’ “Dagim”, though the latter employed a different technology. 

The first half of the narrative is the stuff of cinematic magic. It's almost a fully realized concept. The film creates an atmosphere as stunningly otherworldly as the settings in Peter Jackson and JK Rowling flicks. They stick in your mind like some burdensome nightmare. Briskly paced and peppered with tongue-in-cheek humor, “Tiktik” is a refreshing journey into cinematic netherworld.

Unfortunately, the narrative structure crumbles as climax is being built. The onslaught of monsters soon turns tedious and errr... repetitive. You’d have thought by the time Tatang (Roi Vinzon) arrives, all hell would break lose and the excitement would further escalate into pulse-pounding, nail-breaking tension. At this point, the narrative element plateaus, losing much of its cinematic steam. The baby switching scene is particularly a head scratcher. A powerful flying monster as gargantuan as Tatang could easily take the poor child and the four baby-carriers in one clean sweep. He doesn't have to choose at all. 

During the house offensive, the monsters could have gone straight to the roof knowing fully well they’re salt and garlic-free. The Visayan folkloric “kikik” operates the same way: they find themselves on roofs, drill a hole and insinuate their elongating tongue on a pregnant mother’s engorged belly. Yet the tiktik’s intrusion took forever; a cinematic conceit to prolong the siege surely. 

This aforementioned tack is conspicuous early on. When Pareng Antonio and son arrive in Nestor’s home, they were urgently instructed to run for cover, yet after a painfully long wait, they just stood there waiting for kingdom come; and came it did. You couldn't help but think: “Good for you! You’re too stupid to live.”

How about the events surrounding wife Fely's eventual demise? When Nestor finds his wife being pulled and munched on like a piece of meat in the corner of the room, he stands and pretends to fall – several times – instead of the “fight-or-flight” instinct of protecting a spouse. Is this part of the running gag that perpetuates Nestor’s character – that he indeed doesn't have the balls? Like some bad joke that needed to be told? This doesn't bode well because you don’t build up empathy by providing your audience with idiots who won’t even try to protect their loved ones when they need their help the most. In the scheme of things, idiots die in horror stories. Yet Nestor lives on to see another day. Go figure. It’s more “kainis” than “katuwa”.

Personally, I still believe that horror and comedy are an ambiguous cinematic pairing. These two discrepant emotional entities - fear and joy - are as mismatched as a pair with one piece Crocs and another Louboutin. Can you validly say you shiver with fear then shift easily to a joyous laughter? You have to be twisted to say "yes". If you want to be truly scared, try Ben Affleck's "Argo". I was hyperventilating in my seat waiting for them to board their Swissair plane out of Iran.   

Dingdong Dantes turns in a consistent, albeit solid performance, thus his depiction of a not-so-lovable loafer is valid and believable. He succeeds to make his audience root for him despite his brassy and course demeanor. That, in itself, is a testament to his escalating thespic brio. However, Lovi Poe, though fetching, is hobbled by her underwritten character. Sure, we know she’s the town’s only source of inspiration (the only girl to have graduated  from college - and proceeded to become a teacher) – until she got knocked up. She wasn't given much except look bored or exasperated - and anything between these emotional brackets. This clearly isn't much.

It’s actually Janice de Belen and Rina Reyes who shine in their limited screen moments. De Belen was feisty and funny. Reyes was restrained when she could have gone to town as the "town tsismosa". Now imagine what Irma Adlawan could have done for the same role? I shiver at the thought. The street urchins – Mike Gayoso (as Ringo), LJ Reyes (as Hilda), RJ Salvador (as Kulot), Cris Pastor (as Mutya), et.al. were also adequately sinister. In fact, the throng reminds me of Joel Schumaker's “Lost Boys” – or even the gang from "Twilight". They were wonderfully conceived and executed. If only a more legible second half of the narrative was ironed out adequately.  

But all these quibbles are moot and academic. The fact is, this is a groundbreaking visual feast and has to be appreciated and patronized so that the think tanks of the industry can consider making more in the same cinematic constitution. It’s not a perfect film, as other critics would make you believe, but it isn't run-of-the-mill either. There isn't much emotional pillar to hang on to so you leave the theater disconnected from any of the film's character. But the movies are a visual medium, and "Tiktik" succeeds in this aspect. Michiko Yamamoto, the film’s script consultant, could have tweaked its script to a more compelling finish.  

Lastly, the limited nationwide screenings of "Tiktik The Aswang Chronicles" can only harm the production's chances of making money (although it's said to have grossed P10 million since its opening). In Cebu, for example, Ayala Cinema doesn't carry this title in their four-cinema movie house. SM Cebu, on the other hand, only screens "Tiktik" from 4 PM onward - thus they only have 3 screenings per day, as it is in several SM cineplexes in Metro Manila (In Megamall, it shares a theater with "V/H/S"). Same is true in Davao City (no "Tiktik" in Ayala's Abreeza Mall either) where "Tiktik" shares a theater with another ("Looper").

This makes you wonder. Isn't "Tiktik" produced and released by GMA? You can't get more mainstream than a horror film headlined by Dingdong Dantes and Lovi Poe, can you? Or is GMA's cinematic reach and influence really limited - thus incomparable to the seemingly boundless dominion of ABS-CBN's releasing arm? This dilemma made GMA's "Just One Summer" a fly-by-night wonder. In fact, it got swatted and disappeared in infamy after just 2 days in cinemas - all over the country (except SM North Edsa)! 

GMA has been trying to produce films of considerable narrative heft so it's sad how they're faring badly at the box office. Is this why they're peddling the entertainment network for any willing buyer to the tune of P100 Billion? Manny Pangilinan didn't bite. Why is it being sold if it's really the number one network? Do the math! I just hope the ship doesn't sink. 

        

A beautifully conceived netherworld of nomads, vagrants and immigrants in their own swine market.

Tara Illenberger's Guni Guni - Busy Exposition in Narrative Clutter

Mylene (Lovi Poe) glides through her life with unruffled sobriety. On cursory glance, everything’s a bed of roses for the statuesque medical student: she tops her tough class; she nurtures a seemingly loving relationship with boyfriend/classmate Paolo (Benjamin Alves); and her best friend Joanna (Empress Schuck) is a constantly unwavering presence. But she has disquieting secrets. She possesses a scar that runs the whole length of her torso down to her flank. She would occasionally fight off suicidal tendencies. Moreover, she collects human body parts from her school’s janitor Jonas. However, these gifts come with a dear price. But why such emotional upheavals?

Mylene’s troubles don’t end there. Her rent hasn’t been paid for two months and her promissory note has been rejected. “Ikaw na lang ang ‘di nakakapagbayad at hindi makakakuha ng exams,” reminded the cashier. Meanwhile, on their first year anniversary, boyfriend Paolo is determined to get into her pants. When she stalls, he walks out and leaves her stranded on a remote field. Such frustration.

People at her boarding house have secrets of their own. Her landlord Tatay Nanding (Jaime Fabregas) who’s afflicted with Alzheimer seems to be feeding raw meat to a creature that’s buried at his backyard garden. Mrs. Arevalo (Gina Alajar) cryptically waits for her son Javier’s (Guji Lorenzana) intermittent visits. Nanny Vangie (Julia Clarete) diligently follows after her mentally challenged ward JJ (Gerald Pesigan), all the while pining for the affection of JJ’s father (Neil Ryan Sese), a detail man in Tarlac. Meanwhile, Joanna (Empress) could feel the restless presence of wandering souls all around her. When a new girl (Ria Garcia) arrives to rent an available room, mysteries further rankle the already muddled scenario. And our characters start dropping like flies.    

Mylene

Paolo: the impatient lover

Tara Illenberger is one of the industry's most prolific film editors, and editors usually make great directors. It comes with the territory of judiciously using pieces of a story to make a coherent whole. This was why it was a thrill to hear about Illenberger's first mainstream project. Unfortunately, Illenberger's "Guni Guni" (Figment) is a product of an over eager storyteller. In fact, you'd be hard pressed to point out a singular narrative strain more urgent than the next. There are too many disparate concepts that don't mesh well with the individual predicament of our characters. The by-product is one messy cinematic experience that's more tiresome than frightful.

Are we discoursing about guilt? Retribution, maybe? Alienation? Insanity? Are we dealing with ominous fixations? If the answers are all "yes", then we know there's a problem. A film has to have a single focus. In "Guni Guni" however, there are several creatures that go bump in the night: and every single character is hounded by them; there's the eye-enucleating, sexually starved doppelganger with eyes made of tin foil hastily pasted over the lids; the Juon-patterned ashen faced child ghost; there's the aborted fetus; the visiting ghost of a son, etc. There's also a bevy of issues not directly related to the horrific premise - like the infanticipating Alicia (Ria Garcia) who underwent a simplistic dilatation and curettage procedure from medical student Mylene - or did she? Her story came and went without much fanfare. In fact, you could rid of Alicia's character without disrupting the flow of the story. Why was she there in the first place?

SPOILERS

Mylene is collecting human body parts that would somehow physically re-construct Myra, her Siamese twin; these would approximate her physical persona had Myra survived. You see, Mylene was born a conjoined twin, but her twin Myra had to be sacrificed because they shared a single heart. "Ikaw ang pinili ko kasi napakaganda mo, anak," explained their looney mother (Isay Alvarez) who's mentally scarred for life for doing so.

In the film, you'll find a medical class whose only subject lingers around twins - as though they are specializing in Twinology more than treating the sick body. And if it isn't serendipitous enough, Dr. Gonzaga (Chinggoy Alonzo) isn't just Mylene's didactic professor; he was also the same doctor who separated Mylene from twin Myra some 20 years ago. Doesn't this shake you to the core? Are you still following me? :) Moreover, there's a best friend with a 3rd eye. Her senses are too acutely aware of the spirits moving around the house, yet she never unravels any of the mysteries surrounding them. How useless naman, debah?  

Joanna feels the presence of ghosts.

Mylene buys Tatay nanding's meat.

Lovi Poe inhabits Mylene with enigmatic chagrin, but something about her guilt - or lunacy - doesn't rope you into her life. She inspires detachment more than empathy, thanks to the muddled character development. Benjamin Alves registers well and competently tackles his naughty persona with adequate verve. Empress isn't really allowed to do much, though she's never bad. Others don't fare as well - Gina Alajar's cryptic Mrs. Arevalo is so theatrical, you wonder where her thespic control and brilliance have gone after all these years. Ditto to Isay Alvarez who's very lost in her lunatic borborygmus.

With sparkling camera work, great production value and an embarrassing riches of talent, it's such a pity to end up with a snooze-worthy product that's more narrative diarrhea than compelling story. Pass that Imodium tablet please.  

One-year anniversary frolic

Alicia is pregnant and gets an abortion from a medical student even before the latter does clinical work. 

Tin-foil eyes recklessly pasted over the lids.

Lovi Poe

Benjamin Alves

Benjamin Alves

Empress Schuck

Lovi Poe and Benjamin Alves

Joel Lamangan's Sigwa – Raging Storms and Troubled Souls

It took Dolly (Dawn Zuleuta) 35 years to return to the Philippines. Back then, she was a wide eyed optimist visiting her parent’s motherland for the first time. She also believed that well meaning people like her could fight a feeble system and change the world. Several years later, she has returned for a more compelling reason; one that took her back to that tumultuous era. In the early seventies, she hurriedly escaped the clutches of Martial Law quite scathed and dazed, leaving a daughter under the care of Azon (Gina Alajar). In the crossfire of warring ideologies, many have perished. Including her child, or so she thought. But a common friend recently tells her that the child is alive.

At the height of an oppressive dictatorship, young idealist Dolly (Megan Young) – a junior correspondent of a US magazine - is welcomed by a group of student activists who ushered her into the ideals of their advocacy. She meets student leader Oliver (Marvin Agustin) and his girlfriend Cita (Pauleen Luna); the persevering Azon (Lovi Poe) and the dependable Rading (Jay Aquitania); then there’s the restrained Eddie (Allen Dizon) with whom Dolly gets into a relationship. With adequate fervor and high-mindedness, the group soon finds themselves joining the underground movement bent on toppling an oppressive government.

But each member is deliberately captured. The ladies are raped; the guys are subjected to hellish tortures until their souls have all been beaten to a pulp, providing names and whereabouts of their other comrades. Meanwhile, Dolly’s been recovered by the authorities who have been informed that she’s an American citizen, giving her the privilege to abandon her group’s cause and fly back to America while everyone else faces a bleak future.

But 35 years have changed people. Dolly has chosen to live a solitary life. Oliver (Tirso Cruz III) has joined the government, acting as the presidential spokes person, while Cita (Oliver’s former girl friend, this time played by Zsa Zsa Padilla) has risen in the ranks of the left-leaning revolutionary group. She has in fact become their supreme leader. Dolly has required the help of Oliver, now in the position of finding people, to locate Azon (Gina Alajar) who was left with Dolly’s child at the height of the insurgency. Dolly’s pursuit has unraveled strife anchored by their past. Is her daughter still alive? Will she ever find her?

Joel Lamangan’s “Sigwa” (Storm) is a harrowing journey that follows the lives of student activists with ponderous tenacity. On the foreground is a mother’s search for her child, but it’s merely a device used to introduce us to the characters. Though compelling and thematically clamorous, the focus wavers from too much detail. This isochronous storytelling tends to provide a less cohesive work, denying the material to soar. That’s always the plight of a material with a multitude of climaxes, thus the story eventually plateaus. This is not saying that Lamangan’s “Sigwa” is an insignificant material. It in fact deserves to be seen and remembered.

Megan Young and Dawn Zulueta competently link the past and the future with honest portrayals as Dolly. Marvin Agustin delivers one of the most emotionally distressing depiction of a torture victim. While his tears trickle down his cheeks and he pleads for his life, you are punched in the gut by the scene’s realism. Tirso Cruz III, who plays the older Oliver, is equally treacherous as the cabinet secretary who’s had a change of heart. Gina Alajar, brilliant as ever, mines her veteran instinct to show the emotional groundwork of a mother who’s afraid to lose a child she’s nurtured as her own. I do have certain misgivings in Zsa Zsa Padilla’s portrayal. Maybe I’m too much weaned on her being the sophisticated lady that she is that it doesn’t seem right to see her carry guns and don sneakers, and tough talking like a revolutionary honcho. But she works hard for her part and it shows. Allen Dizon seems misplaced and looks awkward and ill at ease in many of his scenes, and the age gap between Megan’s Dolly and Dizon’s Eddie (he was planted by the military to spy and infiltrate the leftists) is a lumbering fact.

The torture and rape scenes feel sanitized. The sense of dread is somehow watered down by its careful staging. In my mind, there’s a need to stage a brutal scene – allow it to be ruthless and ferocious - to underline the horrors of an amoral military rule gone mad. Torture victims are scarred for life, and they don’t experience savagery with cotton candy ministrations. Despite its busy narrative, fragmented storytelling and its tendency for maudlinism, “Sigwa” is better realized than the indulgent “Ka Oryang” (which won Best Picture at the recent Cinema One – a truly despicable year for the festival).

A favorite scene is Dolly and Azon’s meeting. In this scene, the camera frames a troubled Azon – with Alajar in tremendous control – while the light from outside is casting shadows against her face. It was a deliberate form of visual poetry concocting a singular emotional moment that highlights Azon’s chagrined soul. Are there limits to what a mother would do to keep a daughter? Boundless.

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow – Painfully Bad, Excruciatingly Schmaltzy

Mariel (Maricel Soriano) rules the family-owned television network with steel fist and feral stance. It’s an aspect of her life she has absolute control of. Otherwise, her private life is in shambles. Her only daughter Eunice (Eula Caballero) favors her stepmother Charlotte (Carla Abellana) over her. Her former husband Garry (Gabby Concepcion) lives in marital bliss with new wife Charlotte. Meanwhile, her brother Jacob (Jericho Rosales) helps out in the network, but seems preoccupied with his domestic affairs: his wife Lorie (Lovi Poe) despises spending most of her time with their baby boy, and occasionally steals moments to sing for her band. The family patriarch (Ronaldo Valdez) – a paraplegic - oversees his business empire with his intermittent presence, while his second wife Agnes (Agot Isidro) has an extra marital affair with her personal trainer Derek (Dennis Trillo). Celine (Solenn Heusaff), Mariel’s half sister is patiently “training” under the wings of her acid-tongued half sister. She is dismissive of her boyfriend Vince’s (Paulo Avelino) constant presence, and harbors an attraction with Derek.

One day, a powerful earthquake bears sweeping repercussion to the tedium of their lives.

HIGH STRUNG

With unbelievable schmaltz and a persistently high-strung turn of events that play out like livid strokes of slap-happy melodrama, Jun Lana’s “Yesterday Today Tomorrow” once again displays Lana’s fixation to the 80’s flavored drama. In fact, I didn’t realize this was Lana’s work until I curiously found some blatant semblance to the recently shown “My Neighbor’s Wife”. It may in fact be a narrative extension of the latter. Even the actors in “My Neighbor’s Wife” – Dennis Trillo, Lovi Poe and Carla Abellana – play similar character arc and motivations.

WHAT HAPPENED, MARICEL?

What’s worse: Lana has managed to singularly destroy Maricel Soriano’s spotless reputation as an insightful, albeit superior caliber actress. What happened to Maricel Soriano? There never was a time that La Soriano was ever mediocre in any of her previous film projects: drama, comedy, action, even dance/musical. She could run thespic rings around her former rival Sharon Cuneta who, in her earlier years, coasted solely on charm and media hype. But for the first time, I was surprised to find Ms. Soriano heavy handed and misdirected. This was a Soriano that’s graceless, shrill and mediocre. Her one-note performance is baffling. What has time done to one of the most versatile actresses this business has ever produced?

CACOPHONOUS

Lovi Poe and Carla Abellana aren’t bad, but what do you say about a performance that mimics their own portrayal in a different film (“My Neighbor’s Wife”)? You don't get a pat on the back for repeating yourself! I’d have to say that in confrontation scenes involving Maricel Soriano and Carla Abellana, the latter gracefully stood her ground against the formidable Soriano. In fact, it actually emphasized Abellana’s inherent gift because she made Soriano look cacophonous and roughly discordant in temperament. That isn’t saying Abellana is worthy of an award. In this flick, the only commendable performers are Dennis Trillo, Jericho Rosales, and surprisingly Solenn Heusaff!

Trillo depicts his kept-boy character with empathy. He is onerous to decipher. In fact, he delves into Derek in multiple levels of execution; he paints Derek’s intentions as a gray area. That’s no mean feat, considering how Lana wrote his characters. Rosales has always been a sensitive performer. His sincere depiction keeps his and Lovi’s story viable. I only visualize a problem whenever he starts enunciating in English (like when he delivered his child’s eulogy). Solenn Heusaff is an amazing find. She is very comfortable in her role. You feel when she winces after getting dressed down by her half sister in front of others, or when she’s turning his boyfriend away, or when she flirts with her mother’s personal trainer. Heusaff is an honest performer, and she delves into her scenes with no emotive excesses. Her debacle? She speaks rather briskly. On stage, as in cinema, emphasis of text takes priority. Your words should resonate, regardless of how brief or simple they are.

IMPLAUSIBLE

Jun Lana is a notable playwright. He is the youngest member of the Palanca Hall of Fame in 2006, winning 11 of them previously. But his film work as a director is too far removed from his excellent writing. In fact, he lingers from too much caterwauling and peppers his narrative with implausible coincidences. Furthermore, the most preposterous “deus ex machina” is intermittently laid out like freebies to move his narratives. How many times did Celine catch his mother in her personal trainer’s flat? Isn’t once enough? When Charlotte suddenly finds Mariel nauseated, there was a suggestive glance exchanged between the wife and the ex-wife, you’d think Charlotte would start getting suspicious, but she didn’t. Whenever a scene is expected to shift its plot, the music swells – you’d think the sky's going to start falling anytime.

Lana is ill at ease being a megman. And if I were to be very blunt about it, he is wanting of talent where visual story telling is concerned. Stick to what you do best, Mr. Lana, and leave film direction to those who know what they’re doing.

Otherwise, we’re all stuck in strung-out melodramas that make bad actresses out of good ones – like Maricel Soriano. It is such a revolting comeback vehicle for someone of Soriano's stature. Isn't that sad?

Aswang – Of Lazy Runners and Subterranean Monsters

When Gabriel and Anya’s (Albie Casino and Jillian Ward respectively) parents figure in a property dispute, the siblings suddenly find themselves orphans when their household is massacred by hired assassins Rodel, Queenie and the reluctant Daniel (Marc Abaya, Nina Jose and Paulo Avelino respectively). To escape their parents’ slayers, their getaway vehicle eventually takes them to far flung Pampanga, looking for a distant relative they couldn’t locate.

But amidst deceptively bucolic sugarcane fields and ramshackle dwellings, something sinister is gripping San Isidro. The rural folk speak in hushed whispers, goading them not to stay on. People are dying from a paroxysm of attacks brought about by blood-curdling, albeit ravenous creatures called “abwak” – humanoid forms that hybrid giant lizards and crows that travel by flight and subterranean inclination (think big “moles”). Suddenly, San Isidro becomes the unseemly setting of this life-and-death chase. Little did Gabriel, Anya and their assailants know that creatures more deleterious than the vagaries of human greed lurk at the fringes of the barrio.

While scampering for shelter, Gabriel and Anya, hopelessly aimless and wayward, are unaware that the baddies have traced their whereabouts.

Daniel and company arrive in Pampanga. Then comes the enigmatic Hasmin who seemingly glides into the place like a breath of fresh air. When Daniel finally meets the lass, he couldn’t shake her off his mind, but on his way to further seek her, he’s attacked by an abwak. How does he survive the attack? Will he find Gabriel and Anya? More importantly, would he be able to pull the trigger this time?

And why is a hitman like Daniel circumspect?

Director Jerrold Tarog weaves a tale that would, from the ground up, hold your attention as he takes advantage of cultural mores and rich local color of the Philippine countryside. The “abwak” hails from Tarog’s imagination, his new age version of the “aswang” afflicting the countryside. Sounds like a modern masterpiece, right?

Unfortunately, it isn't.

Tarog is able to realize the visual stipulation that concocts this monster. After all, a horror piece rests its raison d’etre on a feasible, convincing monster. The creature itself is a local version of the “graboids” from Ron Underwood’s 90’s flick “Tremors”. And let’s not forget “Dune’s” sandworms. What bothers me is its wavering nature. It’s a humanoid form that can transform itself into a crow-like creature; it can subsist underwater like a “bayawak”, then burrow itself underground like subterranean animals. (See example here: http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v427/n6973/images/427409a-i2.0.jpg) or here: http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110629175747/multiverses/images/e/ec/Kobold.jpg

If an abwak is indeed as versatile as it’s supposed to be, why are their numbers dwindling? Isn’t such trait advantageous for natural selection and evolution? Flight allows them to explore other places and disperse their species. But they choose to stay in a sparsely populated barrio at the risk of eventually wiping out their kind. What gives?

“Aswang” fails to deliver a sense of urgency in several scenes that require heart-stopping pursuits. In one of its earlier scenes alone, when an abwak attacks a drunken JC Tiuseco on his way home, the monster throws his victim down and you don’t even see the victim parry the creature’s attack. He just looked at him, enamored by his prosthetics, with upper extremities flaccid and passive - and allowing the monster to take a huge bite. Thus begins our foray into some of the laziest victims this side of gorefest.

LAZY VICTIMS

While on the run, you hardly feel the immediacy of flight when Albie Casino and Jillian Ward drive away from the killers. Most of the film would have them in constant lackadaisical departure. Check out the scene when they were rescued by Hasmin from the abwaks’ cavern before they turn into food. Instead of running for safety and fleeing as fast as they could, you find these dingbats leisurely walking “in the park”. If you’re about to become part of the buffet, would you take your sweet time to leave?

The same laziness is found in scenes involving head henchman Rodel (Marc Abaya) who, after getting attacked by the same monsters, preferred staying on. You experience the incursion of monsters first hand and you choose to merely stand beside your vehicle and wait for your comrades? This doesn't make sense. When he eventually runs out of bullets in a later scene, he turns away – and walks! Yes, he walks away from the creatures! Haven’t people in Tarog’s world ever heard of that verb called “run”? This preposterous apathy among victims take the fun away in a movie that’s supposed to pump our adrenaline by laying on a good dose of thrill and urgency; the instinct of “fight or flight” has been disregarded in cinema’s most indolent thriller.

How do you – as an audience – relate to a scary movie when the characters plagued by monsters aren't even too concerned to flee – even when the creatures come charging by? This sense of apathy doesn't belong to such genre, i.e. “suspense thriller” but to a middling drama with a director whose vision is focused on his generation of atmosphere and visual effects than on character development, persuasive performance and viable staging of dread, of panic, of trepidation.

The narrative has so much on its plate. It hobbles the cinematic focus. There’s Daniel’s back story (why he turns into a hunky vengeful dingbat who can’t pull the trigger, you’d suspect he has a degenerative muscular disease); there’s Hasmin and sisters Stella and Isabel’s (Precious Lara Quigaman and the promising Ana Vicente) morbid historical past; the impending wedding of Hasmin to their tribal leader Ipo Moises (Bembol Roco), a budding romance, etc.

Lovi Poe glides through her character like an arcane damsel filled with pathos and compunction. She is in fact the film’s single salvation, although Paulo Avelino doesn’t do so badly himself. But Avelino’s character teeters with brimming indecisiveness. Though he is introduced as someone with the conviction to avenge his slain father, he mostly comes off irresolute. Poe and Avelino’s chemistry is undeniable though. They look good together and they navigate the silver screen with a degree of tension and diversion.

Nina Jose as Queenie

Albie Casino, good looking as he is, is surprisingly droll - and stiff. He wasn’t this bad in “Mara Clara”, but in “Aswang”, he fills his character Gabriel with pussyfoot demeanor, you’re almost sure he isn’t capable of fathering a child from the get-go. But then appearances are deceiving. Casino, as Gabriel, navigates his surroundings with detachment, ironic in itself considering Gabriel just lost his parents in the most violent way. Doesn't Gabriel deserve an emotional girth the size of Araneta Coliseum? He might as well be enjoying a day out in a leisure park than eluding 1) assassins, 2) flesh-eating creatures. Why are the most beautiful faces the hammiest of actors? (Richard Gutierrez: check; Aljur Abrenica: check!) Jillian Ward’s “I’m a cute tyke” schtick doesn’t work either; her posturings are more annoying than “cute” since cuteness doesn’t make a horror movie.

Marc Abaya, playing the meaner-than-mean head assassin, once again takes his character with livid thespic strokes, you can’t help suspect he would eventually transmogrify into Beelzebub himself. This depiction is exactly similar to his role in Joaqui Valdez’s “Dagim” (about cannibals in the mountains). He could have hopped from that set to this, there wouldn’t be discernable contrariety. This has always been Abaya’s unfortunate inclination. When he portrays, he goes all out, with no heed for restraint. Sad.

Precious Lara Quigaman is decorative as Stella (Hasmin’s elder sister), and actually provides emphasis on the excesses of Tarog’s story. Tarog could have done away with the character and come out with a tighter story. Why does Ipo Moises (Bembol Roco) threaten Hasmin with Stella’s well being when he could have done it on Hasmin herself? Joem Bascon plays Kuya Efren, Stella’s beau, but isn't given much. In fact, Nina Jose registers better as Queenie, one of the assassins. She looks enthralling and menacing - like a James Bond belle; a more effective tack as a nemesis than all the ministrations of Nonie Buencamino (who plays the mastermind) and Marc Abaya combined.

The languid pace of the narrative could have worked well before the requisite escalation into cinematic fireworks. The creatures could have been powerful images that stick to our consciousness. A lot of things could have worked. But it takes me back to the apparent disinterest of the victims when being pursued by the subterranean creatures – and, of course, Albie Casino’s enthralling cluelessness. If they cared less about being eaten alive, why should I care?

Lovi Poe


Lovi Poe


Paulo Avelino


Paulo Avelino



Paulo Avelino comes to his own as a leading man.


Albie Casino



Albie Casino


Albie Casino


Jillian Ward


Marc Abaya in "Dagim"


Marc Abaya