On Charice, John Prats, Cinemalaya Delicadeza & San Francisco Film Makers

ANYTHING BUT THE DONUT

Setting: NAIA Terminal 3, Mister Donut (MD) stall

Customer to MD crew: Miss, meron kayong Krispy Kreme na donut?

Mister Donut crew: Sorry, ma’am. We’re a Mister Donut outlet!

Customer: Ah, ok. (She leaves for 5 seconds, then returns.)

Customer to MD crew: Eh, Gonuts, meron kayo?

DELICADEZA AND FAST TRACKING A CAREER

I've always wondered how some people could look at their faces in the mirror with dignity. Sometimes blood is thicker than the common decency of not taking advantage of ones post.

Let's take, for example, Laurice Guillen, director and head honcho of the amazing Cinemalaya Festival (this year has churned out the best crop of movies in years). Guillen greenlights production of most main features. She even has a say regarding script changes and casting choices. In the past, Guillen has allowed the casting of her daughter Ina Feleo in two Cinemalaya main features - Jade Castro's "Endo" (2007) and Milo Sogueco's "Sanglaan" (2009) where - surprise, surprise! - Miss Feleo has won for herself Best Actress awards!

Ina Feleo is pretty. She isn't a bad actress either, but "Best Actress" caliber is really stretching it! I can think of a dozen names in the indie scene that could act up a storm more than Feleo. And for her to keep getting starring roles in Cinemalaya features that other better actresses deserve is a judicial travesty! Fast forwards 2011, Ina Feleo once again topbills a film directed by her mother Laurice (co-starring Shamaine Buencamino and Tirso Cruz III) - "Maskara"! And, like the whole Cinemalaya event is their family playground, Guillen even fields "Maskara" as their opening film!

Where has delicadeza gone?

I could think of 5 films that would make a great festival opener, not "Maskara"! As for Ina Feleo, I am glad to see her in teleseryes ("Guns and Roses"). I didn't care much if she won "Best Actress" awards from her Cinemalaya starrers though, once again, I can easily name better performances from the Cinemalaya entries in 2007 and 2009. But is there honor in fast tracking a showbiz career through an event that should otherwise be a venue of freedom, truth and excellent new breed of film making?

FROM SAN FRANCISCO TO MADAGASCAR

Setting: Greenbelt 3 Cinema Lounge (in front of Cinemalaya booth)

Cinema goers were reading from a program. Program sellers were abuzz with activity. People were coming and going. Raymond Bagatsing and Ronnie Lazaro were generously accommodating a crowd nearby. I was holding on to my tasteless New York Fries, observing people while waiting for my date buying soda.

Young director to several people at the booth: Hi, I’m Benito Bautista, director of “Boundary”… San Francisco!

Saw the guy he was talking to. He was needlessly perplexed. Should have been me. “Hi, I’m Cathy Pena, cinema vixen… Antananarivo, Madagascar!”

TIME OF HIS LIFE

I was channel surfing when I caught a segment of “Happy Yipee Yehey”. The next set of contestants would be this population of people desperate enough to make a fool of themselves on TV.

Jason Francisco: “Pumunta po kayo bukas 1PM ng hapon!” You bet! 1 PM in the afternoon, not 1PM in the morning, clear?

WHY NOT CHARICE

A flawed but brilliantly realized semi-documentary called “Bahay Bata” (Baby Factory) has gritty realism. The story happens one Christmas Eve in San Lazaro Hospital.

Young mother no.1 (YM1): Hoy, ate, ano’ng pangalan ng baby mo?

Young mother no. 2 (YM2): Charice.

YM1: Ay, bakit Charice? Ang pangit ni Charice Pempengco! Sa akin, Sarah (Geronimo).

OWNING A PAIR

John Prats is a likeable guy. He is handsome, agreeable, and is known to have good work ethics, but when it comes to the girls that he once liked, he turns into a spineless prick!

Consider the list: Heart Evangelista , Shaina Magdayao, Rachelle Anne Go. Did these girls get their romantic closure from him? It seems that when he gets tired of girls that he once wooed, he simply blocks them out of his life. No goodbyes, no serious talks, no telephone calls, heck, not even a text message saying, “We’re through!” This is the worst kind of man you’ll ever meet. He lives his life in a misdirected vicious cycle. Careful, Bianca!

Why not grow a pair. Mr. Prats?

CONSTRUCTIVE

Going back to Charice, if you’ve been following this blogsite, you would know that I only have good words for Charice. I believe in her talent. I mean, those pipes can't be anything but sent from the heavens, right?

But it seems that she’s getting too onion skinned for constructive criticisms. To bolster this attitude, she even boasts of a set of fans that would defend her to the death. Anyone who speaks ill of her, they will massacre! Right, Mr. Nestor Torre? When the latter wrote why Charice doesn’t have the physical qualifications of being a “Kim” (Miss Saigon) – a rather didactic discourse on what or how a Kim should be – the entertainment journalist was deluged with the nastiest replies from Charice’s supporters, 200 replies to be exact! Some twats even researched Mr. Torre's photos and made a dartboard out of it. Last time I checked, Mr. Torre wasn't gonna be Kim, was he? These sniveling idiots!

I believe Charice doesn't make the rightful Kim either. We grew up hailing every Filipina who has sung “Sun and Moon” with her Chris. We also know where Mr. Torre comes from. Eh hindi naman kasi talaga bagay no!

Meanwhile, when a fan wrote her observation at Charice’s fan page in Facebook, i.e. that she seemed a little too heavy when she last portrayed Sunshine Corazon in “Glee” – where she performed another rousing number (the spectacular “As Long As You’re There”) – what did Charice do? She closed down her fan page and even tweeted about her two-faced fans!

Very mature indeed! A class act!

I saw the whole Glee episode and she indeed looked awkward and too satiated – my 7 year old niece even commented, “Ate Charice looks full!” In the same episode, Sunshine was so scared of performing that she wanted to March down the Philippine Embassy (in the U.S.) so "they would revoke my visa". Huh? It's the United States of America who gave you the visa, hon; not the Philippine Embassy! And really now, what could be easier than simply buying a plane ticket to fly back to the Philippines and hide in a cave?

Charice, my dear, people who can’t take criticism gracefully won’t grow into emotionally stable artists and well balanced individuals. You have to learn how to accept other people's observations because you're in the spotlight! You can actually improve yourself from constructive criticism. Not everyone is willing to lick your ass! You have a God-given talent, but you’re not perfect. No one is. It is our divine duty to improve on what weve been given. When sympathizers wish improvements on you, is it really wise to cover your ears? Sometimes, criticisms are there not to be spiteful, but to inspire improvement. Grow up, Charice!

(And for that anonymous cunt from Lake Elsinore, California - and this is obviously meant to be gloriously spiteful, yes, honey, "brainless ass-lickers" like you, dear! Hahaha! What could be more disgusting than sycophantic spineless stools who can't even conjure fictitious names to stand by their thoughts? Go fish for a brain!)

WHAT IS YOUR WORD WORTH?

A dancer and a new actress conquer the music scene. I was checking out the new releases from Odyssey when I saw two new titles. Rayver Cruz just released an EP CD containing 5 songs. When he was a newbie in the business, I saw him play the biopic of Billy Joe Crawford in MMK. He was charming and actually had the pipes to make it as a singer. Years later, he became a dancer!

The other CD was from a sophisticated Solenn (we saw her belt the Beatles’ “Come Together” with Lovi Poe in the improving “Party Pilipinas” and we were quite surprised). Miss Heusaff is spreading herself grandiosely in the business. For someone who once said, quite emphatically on television, “Tandaan n’yo to, after this (Survivor), hinding hindi ako mag aartista!” If the lives of her love ones depended on her word, they’d all be dead, right?

We like Solenn. She is gorgeous, she isn’t a bad actress despite her linguistic crutches, she seems like a decent lady, and she isn't all that bad at singing either. What is there to dislike? But what we’re trying to say is, never say never. Otherwise, what is your word worth? Right, Mr. Bieber?