Sharon, BFF and Her Fans

It was a perplexing experience.

So... for the second time this week, I watched Sharon Cuneta's latest movie, "BFF - Best Friends Forever" - a project that the megastar considers as "my first all-out comedy", a statement that's spurious. To start with, this multi-media superstar has appeared in several all-out comedies before: "Jack & Jill" with Herbert Bautista, and its sequel "... Sa Amerika"; there's the inane "Megamol" which couldn't be anything less than an "all-out comedy" too. But hey, Sharon is known in the business as one who acquires a very sharp wit and keen memory. She remembers names of people - fans she has met only once, reporters who met her fleetingly, etc. Kris Aquino is said to be the same - that's why they inspire fanaticism.

Then comes Sharon's penchant for hyperbole. When she meets a person she takes a liking to, she says, "I really, really like you. I am a fan." And she says this to so many people. It is not that I am questioning her sincerity, because I do believe that she is one of the sincerest of the big stars. I am just stating that the Megastar - in all her earnest or gargantuan achievements - loves to please people. And who wouldn't fall under her spell when she declares that she likes you? Mortals prove powerless to Sharon's megawatt charms! She is one in a million!

Which takes me to watching "BFF" for the second time. I must have missed something the first time I watched it. Coz in all my fandom's ruminations, I seem to have missed any merits that would make a megastar do a movie like BFF - specifically NOT after a box-office and critical success like "Caregiver" that has succeeded in placing her capabilities as an actress into even greater echelons, than what she was known for. She has derived greater respectability as an actress, not just as a star.

I am aware though that one can't do a "Caregiver" all the time, but a "BFF" to add a creamy coating to a gem like "Caregiver" borders on the realm of thoughtlessness.

I am a fan. In fact, I am a 3rd generation fan. Question this fact and I will counter you with every silly trivias, every unfamiliar Sharon ditties of the past, every little movies that no one's ever seen. My grannies are huge followers; so are my parents who were weaned on "Dear Heart", "High School", " Cross My Heart", "Hagkan"and "Dapat Ka Bang Mahalin" way until they marched down the aisle and had me. One cannot help becoming a fan after growing up with a huge collection of vinyls spinning "Swing ang tawag dito... pinaghalong boogie at tango...", thanks to my folks I have learned a helluva trivias that will make me champion on any Sharon Cuneta trivia show. I have grown up with 3 - no - 4 Japanese spitzes named Bubbles - named after Sharon's spitz way back Dasmarinas days in Paraiso Street! But fans also deserve a certain degree of consideration: that the artists we actually look up to do not mock her own weight problems and inadequacies at discipline. That the artists we adore tries to take care of how she looks!

BFF - the movie, teeters unequally between drama and comedy.

If this was "an all-out comedy", the laughs are few and far between - I missed all the punchlines, except 3 scenes, none of which involve Sharon. Fortunately for me, the audience that was with me were also staid, serious... no knee-slapping guffaws and rollicking laughter. I wasn't alone after all. They must have expected the beeline from the masa - after all, Ai ai is there and her crowd will draw the comic fans - but we were so few in cinema 4 of Megamall on a suweldo weekend Saturday. Maybe it's coz there are 2 other theatres showing BFF in Mega? Maybe. One thing is sure, if this were an experiment, the comeuppance tilts towards a failed experiment.

Had this project - which the ads on TV label as "certified box office hit" - become a mammoth hit, THIS would have given the megastar the lazy excuse of appearing again in a comedy, with a girth 3x bigger than John Estrada, one of the disadvantages of a crane shot.

Sharon is a leading lady, the biggest of the lot! This shouldn't be literally interpreted by Sharon who seems to have forgotten that certain degree of responsibility to appear fit and healthy and leading-lady-like FOR her fans - if not for her own health, then for those who have amassed a lifetime collection of memorabilias throughout these years. I silently grieved for my parent's silence as we headed back home, that day after we watched BFF.

Amen.

One Two Three Punch from Joel Lamangan

I'll be damned.

After not having posted any blogs here, Joel Lamangan would seem to dominate my pages. First off, there was the passable "When I Met You". Then there's the interesting indie, "Fuschia" which had a compelling narrative but tepid film-making, as well as disappointing bordeline performances from some of the industry's otherwise reliable veterans - Gloria Romero, Robert Arevalo and Eddie Garcia.

The movie itself could probably be divided in three parts - the light comic chapter, the dramatic segment peppered with sob stories, then the concluding action thriller-cum-pseudopolitical commentary, complete with guns and goons that's always seen in 98% of Joel Lamangan movies. As always, there are gun-toting matons riding a jeep, harassing people, kidnapping or mugging a character or two. This ouvre is also a glaring example of the limitations that even veteran performers like the aforementioned stars suffer in the hands of a mediocre script. Arevalo's supposed funny verbal tirades against Eddie Garcia kept falling flat. But it is heartening to see Ms. Romero churn out a charming, albeit spunky performance. She would have made Anita Linda's award-winning "Adora" a lot more engaging since we feel that most of the acclaim in the latter has been overrated. Bad bad me for bad mouthing veterans? Nah, just saying as I see it.

The third Lamangan feature is the homo-fantasy "Heavenly Touch" that's currently cashing in at the Galleria's Cinema 9. Rodel (Paolo Serrano) and Jonard (newcomer Joash Balejado) are disparate souls working together at a massage parlor. Errr, haven't we heard of this story before? Oh yes, we have - many many times before - and in better made films. Without batting an eyelash, we'd figure out that they earn a living by providing heavenly touch to tired bodies. Soon thereafter, they fall for each other - and get themselves into big trouble.

In Lamangan's oft-repeated cinematic imaginings, this is where we see bad politicos and corrupt police men who possess hordes of big burly men carrying guns, swatting poor denizens in their way. You guessed it too? Brilliant. Then you can predict the outcome of this story. These same burly contravidas were seemingly transplanted straight from "Fuschia" and even Lamangan's "Walang Kawala (No Way Out)" with Joseph Bitangcol and Polo Ravales. Only, this familiar reincarnation of metropolitan squalor has 3, no, 4 full frontal male genitalia swinging all over the celluloid canvas in wild abandon. Akala ko, anatomy class. Hahahaha.

Marco Morales, who always enjoys an enviable screen presence in floozy and run-of-the-mill "indies" shares his dickie wangwang along with Joash Balejado and a couple more extras where they are seen coming out of showers or getting out of a massage room. Alleluiah! Let the scrotal worshippers come rushing to the cinema. LOL. I wonder Marco Morales he keeps flashing the family jewels even in films where he is a virtual extra. His "Butas" seems to have made a lot of moolah thus he really deserves more lead roles, even in exploitation flicks like Heavenly Touch.

How are the performances? Balejado has the presence of former studs like Daniel Fernando, Julio Diaz, et. al. but he badly needs to learn the craft, and I guess it's not a very acceptable excuse that this is his first starrer. After all, there are intensive acting classes all over. On the other hand, Paolo Serrano comes off a natural - strong presence and movie star persona. There are no awkward moments even in ridiculous scenes where he's supposed to prey after Balejado. Baket? Serrano successfully breaks out from his usual male erotic features. Others in the cast suffer the fate of one-note characters: Irma Adlawan (who i thought has totally shed off her theatrical bad habits in several indie features - "Sa North Diversion Road", "Mga Pusang Gala", "ICU Bed 7", "Still Life") revisits these annoying habits ("Mga Munting Tinig", "Tukso", "Dose").

Lamangan is having a blast. But his "Huling Birhen sa Lupa" days are too far behind him, which is too bad. Then the Metro Manila Film Festival is just around the corner. Oh gawd!

Movie Review: When I Met U

Jenny (KC Concepcion) and Benjie (Richard Gutierrez) are two peas in a pod. They are kindred souls who live their seemingly joyful existence through the whims of their controlling and manipulative partners (Alfred Vargas and Iya Villania, respectively). One fateful day, they find themselves spending an overnighter, marooned on a deserted island after their plane encountered mechanical trouble en route to a common friend’s wedding ceremony in Coron, Palawan. After an infuriatingly cheesy cat-and-mouse flirtation amidst lush mangroves and giant lizard, they realize an unmistakable chemistry together.

Once back in civilization, reality sets in. Hooking up as fast friends, they also realize that keeping their current relationships may prove beneficial to both their immediate families as well. But we all know that loving hearts are stubborn, and true love, as the song goes, always finds a way, doesn’t it? Well, at least, in romantic comedies, they do. And this Joel Lamangan-directed starrer is no exception.

The first time I heard that Joel Lamangan was finally chosen to helm this pre-Valentine offering, I was disappointed. I am not such a fan of Mr. Lamangan. His body of work never impressed me, except for a few (Huling Birhen sa Lupa, Deathrow and Pusong Mamon) and I don’t expect “When I Met U” to be among those. KC deserves a better fare than her first movie.

Lamangan’s strong point comes to the fore in that he knows how to somehow please a crowd (Maricel Soriano’s “Bahay Kubo”, Regal's "Mano Po" series) – but not the critically-discerning crowd though. Character development is not among Lamangan’s gifts. This is obvious in “When I Met U”. In fact, the unevenness in the individual narratives between Jenny and Benjie tilts towards Richard’s character. You get to learn the intrinsic mechanics of Benjie’s character through his dysfunctional family: a not-so-easy domestic life of a struggling pilot, an opportunistic father (Tonton Gutierrez) who would rather sell his son’s soul to the devil over the fast buck, etc.

Having said that, Richard’s character Benjie is easily a sympathetic one, and by stroke of luck, Gutierrez comes off with his most believable performance in his entire “leading man” career! We have always been vocal about our indifference to Richard Gutierrez. He was always the “beautiful leading man”, but nary a hint of brilliance. This I believe is somehow because Gutierrez was always “fortunate” enough to be given roles that were always “too big” for his shoes. After all, sometimes greatness isn’t made in a day! In this movie, Richard – like Angel Locsin in “Love Me Again” – takes his artistic steps a notch higher, and I am glad! His mother studio (GMA) has finally given him something that doesn’t overwhelm him, thereby giving him enough space to let his character evolve at his own pace.

Which leaves us with KC Concepcion!

The first 20 minutes of the movie was nagging my patience. KC plays Jenny - a “mall promodizer” (is there really such a term?) who comes off a little too loud and flirty, crass and awkward, and for several instances, more infuriating than endearing or humorous. But as Jenny’s story unravels, we begin to see her in various levels of intensity. This beautiful face is an experimental actress, something that her dear mother Sharon Cuneta would have benefited from had the latter not been too sheltered by Viva Films back in the days. KC does not mind trying new techniques even if in the process, she would look ridiculous (the Hotdog scene), overzealous (the bayawak scene where instead of running away from fright, she waddles in the mud), or downright desperate (the airport scene where she bawls her heart out as her bridal train floats poetically in mid-air). KC is indeed her parent’s daughter – a natural! Had she been banal or flat, she would still look lovely on celluloid. But we have to underline the fact that KC is most effective in her quiet moments; when she weeps without saying much. She must have learned from her mom’s experience in “Madrasta”.

Now, how is “When I Met U” as a cinematic offering? Is it a masterpiece? Surely, it is not! And no one expects it to be. This is made without a grand ambition to be both epic and romantic (like the pretentious and amateurish "Baler"). In fact, the story is way too simplistic; the situations too “maneuvered” to be really believed, but this is where this film succeeds. When a fan-movie doesn’t pretend to be something more than what it is – a crowd-pleasing “fan movie”, then it won’t fall down the pit that made “For the First Time” or even “Paano Kita Iibigin” a big disappointment to “love story” fans like me!

Congratulations KC and Richard!

... an empty piece of a shell...

flashback - crying ladies as a great film

seems only yesterday when the "crying ladies" heralded the advent of an exciting young film maker. my memories came rushing back as this week's clickthecity.com features this movie in the site's "on our shelves" feature. suddenly, there is an exciting spirit that fields fresh story telling, brisk editing and a brave new persona for philippine showbiz's all-time megastar. we were thrilled, to say the least.

BUT THEN, 6 years have passed and what has its director mark meilly really accomplished based on his 3rd film since "crying ladies"? the answer isn't flattering. and i am once again transported back in time why the crying ladies was actually just a mirage of greatness.

here is what i remember: this was a commercial revamping of a popular actress' ambitions to be taken seriously. in some ways, sharon cuneta succeeded, but what cinematic vision is to be had from a director and an actress who flood their first movie together with product endorsements? love mo ba to? love ko to! lucky you and lucky me! haha...


talk about an uncompromising vision. LOL

revitalized after the disappointing holidays

With exams all behind me, i found myself enjoying the humdrum of my life as a shoe-obsessed, film-loving, Mauritius-dreaming Manila girl... so i gallantly offered to pay for my friend's movie seat to watch "Jay" - this Baron Geisler indie that my friend doesn't want to watch.

Lately, most of the movies that I've invited him were so bad he ends up literally vomiting after watching. This started with the whole line-up of Metro Manila Film festival trash that made my head spin. I have single-handedly busted a little fortune paying for the admissions of these basuras. My friend just laughs at my rants saying i deserve this artistic bankruptcy for patronizing the aforementioned movies. "Buti nga so yo," he keeps taunting me. Why? Because I patronized Pinoy films during the whole festival bonanza?

He was saying how asinine Joel Lamangan's Desperadas 2 was. And that I dozed off at a cartoon called Dayo - and I have always LOVE animated films! Don't rub it in! And Shake Rattle and Roll? Shouldn't they have buried this franchise back when Rambo was king? Then there's the multi-awarded Baler! Oh gawd! Whatever happened to occasional director Mark Meilly (he directed 3 films in 5 years) who brought cinematic gems (Crying Ladies, La Visa Loca) in the past. Every bit of that movie was plain amateurish! Para kang nanood ng school play na nagbabaril-barilan ang mga sundalo. LOL.

Then comes "Jay". Ok, I shelled out an extra P120 just to have a friend watch this movie with me. Guess what! After a sketchy start, the whole piece came through. This was a rewarding experience at the movies. People should watch this instead of all those TRASH that polluted the Christmas holidays! Lintik! Pinagastos pa ako!

rourke vs penn

Between classes, I have avoided watching a Pinoy film these days. Forget Rory Quintos' Love Me Again, Piolo doesn't look fun in there! And what good is a romantic film without a fun-and-exciting hero? Forget Rufa Mae Quinto's funny antics, I am still not over the lobotomy that i suffered from watching the moronic lineup from the last MMFF. Thank God, there's Hollywood and the Oscars.

Sure, as it has been customary, we have continually berated on the Hollywood movie machine as nothing but a shallow and money-generating fuckups, but at a particular season like now, suddenly, great films crowd the cinematic gallery. To balance the horrific lack of intelligence in the Philippine MMFF movie season, Oscar-touted flicks gather round my Christmas tree!

Weeee!!!!!

And in my moments of movie-watching bliss, I suddenly realized that Mickey Rourke ("The Wrestler") just might steal the thunder from Sean Penn who was spectacular in Milk!

Go, Mickey!

holiday virus and awarding mediocrity

Did you guys notice the virus that's been going around during the past Christmas-New Year holidays? My god! It sure hit me like the atomic bomb that hit Hiroshima and decimated a whole generation of people. It was a holiday shrouded with bad, bad, bad, bad films! Films that are spoonfed and forced on the Pinoys. Knowing that we - as Pinoys - love our movies, and admit it! - there's nothing better to do after all the Christmas revelry but sit on a dark corner of the theater, the organizers of the Metro Manila Film Festival has fielded a horrific lineup of movies. I of course reserved judgement after I have seen every one! Having done so, I suddenly developed a malady so grave I thought i wasn't gonna make it.

The result? Right after my very last movie, Mark Meilly's Baler - which I intentionally saved for last, I started getting stomach cramps. I could literally feel my brains getting chopped into pieces and my breath couldn't get rid of a stink so overpowering, I just felt sick! Heavens! Now I don't think I wanna invest my allowance on any Tagalog films at least for the good half of the year!

Now here's the funny thing:

They even dignified such festivities with an awards night! Hahaha! Awarding mediocrity is, after all, becoming the IN thing in the MMFF. It is tradition they've been carrying on long before I was even a fetus!