TRIPPING
by Philbert Ortiz Dy
One of the strongest recent trends in our local independent filmmaking scene is the gay-themed film. The freedom of digital filmmaking has afforded filmmakers the opportunity to explore themes that that often considered too risqué or too controversial for the mainstream. And like with any other kind of movie, there are good gay-themed films, and there are bad gay-themed films. Quicktrip happens to be a terrible one.
Cris is the sole breadwinner of his family, and most of his salary goes to fulfilling the various needs of his family, leaving very little for his personal use. He gets into a fight with his boyfriend Andro over money, his boyfriend wanting them to celebrate their fifth month together with a bunch of friends. Cris can’t afford it and would rather spend the night alone with Andro. Andro gets mad and leaves. Cris spends the next day trying to raise some cash and texting Andro for his forgiveness. He asks to meet him for a date, but when Andro doesn’t show up, Cris hooks up with a guy he meets outside a movie theater. It soon becomes clear, however, that Cris may be looking for comfort in all the wrong places.
The movie begins by saying that it’s inspired by a true story. If that’s the case, then it’s proof positive that not all true stories ought to be translated to film. There’s just nothing to the plot, offering little in terms of dramatic tension, or character development, or really, anything worth watching at all. The characters are all terribly inconsistent, changing personalities at the blink of an eye. And worse, the characters are unlikable, and it’s makes it a struggle to care about what’s going on. Why’s Cris so hung up on Andro, anyway? Andro’s just a horrible person, and to have a plot predicated on winning back the affection of a completely unsympathetic character is not a good thing. The dialogue is wince-inducing. None of it sounds like anything an actual person would say. The script is a disaster from start to finish.
The filmmaking isn’t great either. You kind of have to give a bit of leeway for low-budget digital productions, since they really can’t help their technical limitations. Still, it’s difficult to forgive the really inconsistent sound. There are some bits of the movie where we can see the character’s mouth move, but no sound comes out. It’s difficult to overlook shoddy editing. The shot logic is just all over the place, and it makes the movie nearly unwatchable. And there are sequences that just go on for far too long, and as the film goes on, it gets harder and harder to provide justifications for the weak filmmaking.
The acting’s pretty bad, too. It all feels a little high school-ish, with actors obviously waiting on their next line. Topher Barreto, who plays Cris, doesn’t really seem to know what he’s doing. Andro Morgan is just unwatchable as Cris’ boyfriend, not that he’s given much to work with at all. The character of Andro is just so lacking in actual personality that it’s difficult to imagine that anyone could’ve made it work.
It’s always difficult to be critical of these low-budget productions, since you really want to root for the little guy. Unfortunately this movie just doesn’t provide anything to root for. It fails on the most basic of levels, feeling amateurish all throughout. At times, it feels like a high school class project. There’s just no reason to see this movie.
Now, take note of the first commenter from the same review. Sounds familiar? He is sooooo out of it, he is already sounding like a desperate man in dire need of praise! Hahahaha! Poor man! Read and weep:
I saw the film and i think you are the one not worth reading. in the first place, you seem to not have undestood the film beginning with the wrong name for the wrong character. Andro is the guy that Cris meets later and Dexter is Cris's boyfriend. I see you as an outsider tring to make things out from the film that you saw. Perhaps you are from the upper middle class because you didn't seem to recognize the gem that the movie is. QUICKTRIP IS ONE GOOD MOVIE AND IS THE BEST WORK OF THE DIRECTOR SO FAR. It is worth watching for those who have a heart for the poor. Topher Barreto made a very good performance. Even when he is just a newcomer. The cinematography is far better than many indie films I've seen. The movie is not for those who can not dig 'real time' movies like 'kubrador' and 'foster child' because you might find it dragging. But to me and my friends who saw the film, the pacing was just perfect! Every scene is telling you to look into your gay life, and if you happen to be a Filipino gay breadwinner, you will really think: 'how much have i suffered for my family and how much more can i give?".Quicktrip is an uncelebrated, quietly made independent film that will make every intelligent, really intelligent gay man think about how much he longs for something he lost, when he already had the most important thing in his life already.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
IDIOTS ANONYMOUS
After having blogged about Babylon A.D., mentioning what I think about the other movie that I ALSO ACTUALLY PAID TO WATCH - Quick Trip by esteemed, National Artist-caliber and award winning director Crisaldo Pablo, i got 2 adorable anonymous comments from the blog below. I am so delighted! They are so much fun, so I shall answer them like the paying movie goer that i am! Thank you very much for inspiring me to write more about this latter day masterpiece.
Presenting to you Idiots 1 & 2:
Legend: thats moi in highlights, as colorful as my brilliance. teehee...
Idiot 1 says:
eh mas wala namang laman yang vin movie na yan (I agree with you there although i very much doubt if you have actually seen the film! if you haven't, then don't! Or you would have doubled the amount of money you splashed down the sink! LOL. whether diesel's movie is good or bad, it is up to me to critique it coz i PAID to watch it!) anussshhhh! pinanood namin ang quicktrip at kaming buong barkada ay nagandahan sa pelikula! (Now the population of NINCOMPOOPS multiplies! Hahaha! And I beg to disagree. "Moreno" had flashes of brilliance. Sparks lang pala. Haha! Gosh, you're not even familiar with the resume of your favorite director! LOL) ito na yata ang pinakamagandang gawa ng direktor (all hogwash!) dahil pati yung mga kasabay naming nanood ay narinig namin na nagsabi na maganda ang pelikula (where were you when we watched? you should have heard how the people kept making snide remarks! LOL) ang tanging bading movie na hindi sex ang ibibenta kungdi ang puso sa loob ng baklang tao. (You obviously havent watched a lot of the current bading flicks, my dear! or you would have glaringly spotted how inferior this movie is compared to a LOT of new bading flicks!) ewan na lang, siguro mababa ang tingin mo sa kapwa pilipino. (I wonder how you intelligently came up with that idea, hon. I am telling you, parlors aren't the healthiest places to while your time away!) ewan pa ulit dahil siguro hindi ka kasi matalino (strictly dean's lister, honey. teehee) . at nagtataray at nang-aapak ng ibang tao o pelikula para masabi lang na may blog ka. (Bravo!!! Sparks of genius down the latrine! Hahaha!) wag ka na mag-blog wala ka namang naibibigay (who made you mother superior? LOL) na maganda sa kapwa mo ang galing mo pang manira ng ibang tao. kayo ang sumisira sa mundo dahil kung makapintas kayo, sobra, hindi para makatulong kungdi para magtaray lang. saang school ka kaya nanggaling? (You can bet it isn't from your school, or I wouldn't pay a dime! LOL)
Presenting to you Idiots 1 & 2:
Legend: thats moi in highlights, as colorful as my brilliance. teehee...
Idiot 1 says:
eh mas wala namang laman yang vin movie na yan (I agree with you there although i very much doubt if you have actually seen the film! if you haven't, then don't! Or you would have doubled the amount of money you splashed down the sink! LOL. whether diesel's movie is good or bad, it is up to me to critique it coz i PAID to watch it!) anussshhhh! pinanood namin ang quicktrip at kaming buong barkada ay nagandahan sa pelikula! (Now the population of NINCOMPOOPS multiplies! Hahaha! And I beg to disagree. "Moreno" had flashes of brilliance. Sparks lang pala. Haha! Gosh, you're not even familiar with the resume of your favorite director! LOL) ito na yata ang pinakamagandang gawa ng direktor (all hogwash!) dahil pati yung mga kasabay naming nanood ay narinig namin na nagsabi na maganda ang pelikula (where were you when we watched? you should have heard how the people kept making snide remarks! LOL) ang tanging bading movie na hindi sex ang ibibenta kungdi ang puso sa loob ng baklang tao. (You obviously havent watched a lot of the current bading flicks, my dear! or you would have glaringly spotted how inferior this movie is compared to a LOT of new bading flicks!) ewan na lang, siguro mababa ang tingin mo sa kapwa pilipino. (I wonder how you intelligently came up with that idea, hon. I am telling you, parlors aren't the healthiest places to while your time away!) ewan pa ulit dahil siguro hindi ka kasi matalino (strictly dean's lister, honey. teehee) . at nagtataray at nang-aapak ng ibang tao o pelikula para masabi lang na may blog ka. (Bravo!!! Sparks of genius down the latrine! Hahaha!) wag ka na mag-blog wala ka namang naibibigay (who made you mother superior? LOL) na maganda sa kapwa mo ang galing mo pang manira ng ibang tao. kayo ang sumisira sa mundo dahil kung makapintas kayo, sobra, hindi para makatulong kungdi para magtaray lang. saang school ka kaya nanggaling? (You can bet it isn't from your school, or I wouldn't pay a dime! LOL)
September 5, 2008 1:40 PM
Idiot 2 says:
oh but if you read his (its a her, hon. i do have real uterus and a pair of ovaries without the need to check them. LOL) blog you will know that the writer is stupid (yes, so stupid I actually get kudos for having written them below. Stupidity actually reflects where you start commenting anonymously. And that's just for starters. ) and only does blah! (is this gay speak for smart and intelligent blogs? awww shucks! Thanks, hon! mwah! now you're really making me blush! My friend Kyle is gay, gorgeous and single. Want me to set up a date with him? It will shake off all your hostility and stupidity, I guarantee. ) this should be a blah-g and not a blog! (talking about bad puns. thats the best you can offer? LOL) you should keep your thoughts to yourself! (yeah, or you can stay away from my blog. Who inivited you to read and agree with my thoughts? last time i checked, it wasn't me!) your parents should be murdered for having raised someone like your sorry assssss! (now talk about beyond reason... such anger and frustration! vent it to your art, hon. you might be able to make better ones if you actually work WITHIN REASON! that will drive logic and common sense to your scripts, or your stories. The bottom line is, I pity the day your parents conceptualized you. Now you are wrecking havoc to intelligent movie goers who are blatantly presented with banal, mediocre, freaky films like most of Pablo's films. Poor me. I was P140 poorer for a movie that couldn't even finish playing. Imagine paying that much for a pirated-quality movie viewing? I'd be way better off watching the television - which is free! And you even made me pay for a spoonfed vomitus!)
Idiot 2 says:
oh but if you read his (its a her, hon. i do have real uterus and a pair of ovaries without the need to check them. LOL) blog you will know that the writer is stupid (yes, so stupid I actually get kudos for having written them below. Stupidity actually reflects where you start commenting anonymously. And that's just for starters. ) and only does blah! (is this gay speak for smart and intelligent blogs? awww shucks! Thanks, hon! mwah! now you're really making me blush! My friend Kyle is gay, gorgeous and single. Want me to set up a date with him? It will shake off all your hostility and stupidity, I guarantee. ) this should be a blah-g and not a blog! (talking about bad puns. thats the best you can offer? LOL) you should keep your thoughts to yourself! (yeah, or you can stay away from my blog. Who inivited you to read and agree with my thoughts? last time i checked, it wasn't me!) your parents should be murdered for having raised someone like your sorry assssss! (now talk about beyond reason... such anger and frustration! vent it to your art, hon. you might be able to make better ones if you actually work WITHIN REASON! that will drive logic and common sense to your scripts, or your stories. The bottom line is, I pity the day your parents conceptualized you. Now you are wrecking havoc to intelligent movie goers who are blatantly presented with banal, mediocre, freaky films like most of Pablo's films. Poor me. I was P140 poorer for a movie that couldn't even finish playing. Imagine paying that much for a pirated-quality movie viewing? I'd be way better off watching the television - which is free! And you even made me pay for a spoonfed vomitus!)
MOVIE REVIEW: Crisaldo Pablo's QUICKTRIP - One Quick Trip to Fate Beyond Mediocrity
Well, I was about to totally forget the whole thing since really now, it already wasted my money and my time, why extend the agony? But boy, I was suddenly inspired to write more about it, thanks to the bunch of nincompoops that has left their excreta at my comment space. Before I go on further, i would suggest you read them from the Babylon post below. I did not bother to delete them because they amuse me no end. I was awash with pleasure as i read them. It is so comforting to know that there are IDIOTS populating this world! I mean, if God was not good, He would have eliminated them the very moment they were conceptualized! Poof, sperm meets egg - eek! idiots conceptualized - and BOOM! the fertilized ovum explodes to smithereens! Unfortunately, it doesn't happen that way. These fertilized ovum grow into poor excuse of human beings and out they pop into the world to write nonsensical, anonymous comments (see comments from previous post for perfect specimen)!
And we shall thank the heavens for letting them live! Lowlives do deserve to experience life, heaven help them.
Now on to this bading flick. As I mentioned last post, my friend Kyle - cute as Piolo, gay as the gayest carnivals in Rio - invited me to watch Crisaldo Pablo's Quicktrip. I said yes - if he accompanied me to watch Vin Diesel's Babylon A.D. (which sucked) right after. It was a fair deal. Besides, there have been really well made bading flicks - and of late, they are proliferating.
The last few pink flicks I've seen were quite riveting - Adolf Alix Jr.'s "Imoral" and Paolo Villaluna & Ellen Ramos' "Selda". And let's not forget Brillante Mendoza's brilliant "Serbis" which had homo-erotic scenes too. When Joselito Altarejo's "Lalaki sa Parola", a seamless character study of two lost souls, made a LOT of money, a "spurt" (gee! I'm sure commenters 1 & 2 would love THAT word - LOL) of borderline gay movies began cropping up, multiplying like fruitflies! Suddenly, well made gay films were being churned out left and right. There's Sikil, there's Roxxxane! Unfortunately for my dearly beloved friend Kyle, there are also vomitus like Iskandalo and the current one, Crisaldo Pablo's Quicktrip!
What's the deal with Pablo? It is true, he has started all these gay flicks craze. He started out well with the likes of Duda/Doubt. In fact, some reviews even mentioned his technique in the vein of Wong Kar Wai. Thank heavens Kar Wai is still alive or he would have turned into a zombie! LOL
Has anyone seen Pablo's foray into the mainstream? Pitong Dalagita? Thank heavens the main character drowned. She deserved a eulogy sweeter than purgatory. Has anyone seen Metlogs? Wait while I barf! What has happened to Cris Pablo? He should have learned his film making 101 after being a veteran of 5 years, but you see, the bitter fact is that film making brilliance doesn't come out of film schools, regardless of the esteemed stature of having to come from, say, University of the Philippines.
To start with, the script is muddled by lines that are neither prose nor poetry. They are just pa-cute lines that offer insight into the writer-director's mediocre musings - take for example, this one: "Sayang ang mga mata mo pag malungkot ka." Mills and boons is alive! Alleluiah! Hahahaha! During a conversation, when asked about how much he loved the other person, the other character replies with, "Kung gaano kalaki itong bodega, i multiply mo ng isang libong beses!" Now I know what ROLF truly means!
Too bad coz they had a good find in Topher Baretto who registers well on screen, and this boy has the charm and good looks, and acting chops to boot! Topher plays Cris, a lowly waiter who does odd jobs on the side to support his loins as well as his family needs. He works hard for the money and he shares them wholeheartedly. In one scene, when asked where he's off to, he replies by saying that it is his day off today. Much later, he mentions again, "Wala naman akong pasok bukas!" Duh! No wonder he is dirt poor, the idiot scriptwriter forgot that it is indeed Cris' day off today, and it will be his day-off again tomorrow! Hahaha
Now let me backtrack a bit to the opening scene. This guy who is supposed to be a call center agent was talking rubbish on the phone! In full view of all the snatchers! He was on the phone bitching around, talking in the Queen's language! But My God! Que horor! My 5 year old nephew speaks better english than this call center agent! Is this a reflection of this thriving industry? The quality has gone to the dogs...no, cockroaches! Which call center is that, I would dread doing business with them! LOL
Now, lets go to the technical quality of this oh-shucks masterpiece! From the very start, you notice the "strobing" quality of the picture. Ano to, pirated? LOL. Not only that, the images would every so often pixilate like a bad web cam reception! I swear i have better webcam reception here at home! And i don't even let people pay me P140 for a view.
Then here goes the stinker: an hour into the film, the images on screen turn completely blue, yet you hear voices speaking! This goes on for 2 minutes or so. You can't mistake it! This clunker is only shown in Robinsons Galleria's Indiesine, cinema 8... so you guys can check out what I am talking about! This is not the twilight zone! This is reality in the realm of Cris Pablo and his idiot minions.
Is my agony done? Shall I murder my friend Kyle for making me pay P140 for a turkey like this? Oh no Jose! THEY aren't quite done with us! Further into the film, the movie suddenly stops! Then jumps to the opening title! And the movie begins again without having ended! How many times do these people want us to suffer? Jesus! So, the people up there begins fast forwarding the movie, which obvioulsy has no chapter stops. On they forward, and it goes on and on and on! They didn't even seem to have an idea where its supposed to resume! Finally, we couldn't take it anymore. We stood and left!
Kyle asked me if I wanted to get our money back. Oh no! And be seen watching a movie as bad as this one?!!!! No way! I shall donate my P140 to the idiots who made this TRASH! Maybe they can buy a couple of I.Q. and distribute it to the 2 anonymous commenters below. LOL
Now, doesn't what i narrated above qualify for the single term that I used to describe this movie? "Disaster!" This singular powerful term obviously got the IRE of IDIOTS ANONYMOUS that made them say my parents should get murdered for having me. Well, thank you for your anonymous stupidities, it actually spawned a full length review and disertation on this idiocy called Quicktrip!
Now, anyone with half a brain will agree that as a paying public, I HAVE ALL the RIGHT to COMPLAIN about a product that doesn't deliver what it is supposed to. IT IS MY MONEY! I SHALL CALL IT TRASH IF I BELIEVE IT IS TRASH!
Commenter 1 in all his anglicized flourishes even asked me where I attend my college. There's one thing sure, NOT where you went! Good heavens! LOL
Mr. Crisaldo Pablo! Your film school miserably failed you! You deserve your money back! As I deserve my money back! Mas malaki ata ang nagastos mo just to end up into such a mediocre filmmaker. Me, it was just P140 and my time! And hey, it isn't too late to ask for directorial tips from newbies like Adolf Alix, Paolo Villaluna, Dante Mendoza, Joselito Altarejos or even scriptwriter-turned director Jun Lana. That way, you won't be accused of wasting the money of those unfortunate enough to watch your turkey!
Lastly, something has to be said about anonymous idiots. these are ball-less morons who hide in the comfort of their equally moronic drivel. Now hush hush and go back to your beauty parlors, ladies
To the 2 anonymous commenters from my last post: Feel free to make your own BLOGSITE! Somewhere you can praise your own work 'til kingdom come. THIS is my blogsite where I WRITE WHAT I THINK! You are way too lucky my parents allowed me to live, or you would never have tasted a dose of the TRUTH PILL!
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Babylon A.D. - Better Left To Its Ancient Roots
I have been itchin' to watch the new Matheiu Kassovitz movie ever since I saw the trailer. Kassovitz is quite a French hottie who directed the neo-noir masterpiece "La Haine" (Hatred), a black and white cinematic essay on delinquency and violence in a French city. Kassovitz also starred in the sumptuous rom-com, Oscar-nominated "Amelie" where Kassovitz played Amelie's yummy OOD, as Kyle (one of my BFF) succinctly puts it. (OOD = object of desire) He has since directed the disappointing Hollywood thriller, "Gothika" where he was rumored to be fighting with his lead actress, Halle Berry.
So, it goes: Kyle made me a deal. If I accompany him to watch his bading flick at Robinson's Galleria, Crisaldo Pablo's Quicktrip (which was a disaster in all sense of the word), he shall accompany me to watch Kassovitz's Babylon A.D. Besides, bading flicks always seem to produce salivatory eyecandies with little substance - so we went! It was a fair deal.
I like Kassovitz. He has always churned out cerebral films - although he could do with a little more humor in his directorial pieces. And it's been awhile since I was able to watch a high-adrenaline, futuristic sci-fi adventure in the vein of the Terminator series.
SPOILER ALERT!
In a capsule, Vin Diesel plays Toorup who was tasked to safely "deliver" a special girl Aurora (Melanie Thierry, who reminds me of Uma Thurman) from Mongolia to America. The mission is risky. Toorup is a castaway vigilante who cannot enter the U.S., but as sci-fi flicks like this go, there is always a way to attain the impossible. What makes Aurora special? For starters, she started to speak at the age of 2. I did too and it didn't make me anything special. I can speak French. Oi oi oi! Merci! LOL. However, Aurora did her "yeses" in 19 languages! Moreover, there were things she could predict! And finally, she had an immaculate concepcion! And we're talking "twins"!
Now, bad bad girl Charlotte Rampling who plays the High Priestess has planned to secure these babies for the emergence of a super religion of sorts that will eventually dominate the civilized world! The new messiah multiplied by two! Imagine that! If this all seems too tall a story, it is! The characters were badly written. Read: they were boring, and I just couldn't empathize with their plight! I love Michelle Yeoh, who plays Sister Rebecca, who is tasked to take care of uber-Virgin Mary-wannabe Aurora, but the situations they were in didn't move me to sit back and enjoy! In fact, I was fidgeting on my seat! Whatever happened to my beloved Kassovitz? That's what he gets for standing me up at out dinner cruise along the Seine! Hahahaha!
With a narrative that inspires a lot of questions over questions, Babylon A.D. inspired me to bury the concept of this ancient mesopotamian city located in Babil, Iraq! It's better left undisturbed - for good! How was the big big man Mark Sinclair Vincent aka Vin Diesel? Let's just say I won't miss him for now.
Maybe when the latest incarnation of the film "The Fast and the Furious 4" opens June 2009, he shall do better? I probably wouldn't notice. My eyes will be fixed on the scrumptuous Paul Walker whom I have missed for ages! Kay Andrea del Rosario na lang si Vin! Paul is mine!
Touch my errrr... muscles.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Movie Review: Joyce Bernal's For The First Time
Candy Pangilinan plays KC's "yaya" in Joyce Bernal's latest movie, "For The First Time". She also started the ball rolling down to a treacherous slope that has no promise of redemption, except for the fact that KC Concepcion stars in her very first movie. Unfortunately for KC, who is obviously bound for greater glories, the well anticipated movie miserably disappoints.
When the loquacious yaya starts spouting invectives, everything that comes out of her mouth doesn't quite translate into anything humorous. In fact, she was my main source of aggravation in the first 15 minutes of the movie. She just wasn't funny! She inspired my violent rages that I began seeing myself wringing her neck, shaking her endlessly until she realizes that her performance was nowhere endearing or amusing. Her character could be a latter-day incarnation of Suzanne Gonzales or Nova Villa who have played the hilarious nanny to many of Sharon Cuneta's early characters. Unfortunately again, Pangilinan doesn't possess the subtlety of the aforementioned actresses. She is as crass as a those MILF characters spouting ideals on peace. LOL. Having said that, let me go back to the movie.
I had high hopes about this movie. It was an "event" that hasn't escaped even my mother who's vacationing in Davao. And like me, she queued to witness this historical event. Me in Galleria, she in SM Davao. We basically know how the story goes: Rich, but hard working girl Pia (KC Concepcion) meets heartbreaker Seth (Richard Gutierrez) while vacationing in Santorini. She despises him like a fatal disease, which amuses the lothario into wooing her overnight. Sparks fly... or I thought it was supposed to.
There was something amiss with their screen pairing. I can't quite pinpoint the culprit. To be honest, I was never enthralled by Richard Gutierrez. Sure, he is "beautiful" - and though I have watched all his cinematic forays, i was never infatuated with him. His beauty is a novelty that's easy to overcome. He never made my toes curl. He just doesn't seem to possess the gravitas that makes leading men compelling - and that is purely personal. I am sure he has made lots of girls dream wild. Not me. I prefer my men "handsome", not "beautiful".
I have to admit though that his television appearances with KC are something to get yourself worked up with. As a couple, they are a perfection. Which begs the question why they didn't quite work onscreen. The answer must lie somewhere in the technicality of cinematic storytelling. This movie was recklessly told in all its mediocrity. It is such a shame, considering they even have to fly to Greece to spice up the formula. Here's another rub: One hour into the movie, the images onscreen start to blur! Their Grecian canvas becomes badly photographed, I could have shot those scenes better with my amateur video cam. It was so bad, it went on for the next 40 minutes or so! Was this partially filmed using a digital camera? Budget constraints maybe? And isn't Star Cinema a reliable source of glossy, flashy, picture-perfect visuals? The answer is obviously "not all the time". Not this time, at least!
Our troubled heroine Pia trades verbal tussle with Seth while in Greece. By stroke of luck, she makes a deal with the devil (Seth, of course). In a day's worth of flirtation, she falls head over heels in love with the cad. Ganun kabilis nawala ang yamot nya sa manlolokong maningibig. What made her change her mind? Simple! Seth pushed her off the jetty and down the aegean seas! Hahaha. As far as I am concerned, if a guy who woos me pushes me to any body of water, not only will I file a criminal case against him, he will also get a kick in the central recesses of his masculinity! I don't get wooed by murderous maneuvers! In my book, it is brutal, not romantic! But hey, it worked, Pia softens up and even accepts a dinner date that night!
Now let me focus on Seth's character who is inadequately threshed out. He has had a long history of "loving" most of Pia's girl friends, so - when did he have the time to actually live in Greece, learn the language - and in the process stamp an idiotic Italian accent to it - then acquire mastership of a tavern? Not only won't he open the guesthouse at the peak of the tourist season, he also kept dating a bevy of ladies. How did he manage to finance himself or his dates? So, in principle, Richard's character is at best, a figment of an extravagantly fertile imagination; a pulp fiction so desirable that you just have to believe sans logic.
Even as the couple gets back to Manila, the situations kept defying rationality: the greek restaurant scene is one of such scene. Allow me to backtrack to Santorini. When Pia's character fails to find a hotel in Greece, she goes back to Seth's tavern. Instead of eating a humble pie, she kept insulting the owner of the house. Didn't she just beg him to take them back? If so, how can she afford to be rude? This is just among a series of mindbenders littering this cinematic event! And yet, this is such a masterpiece that it actually gets a B Rating from the Cinema Evaluations Board! Which makes you think. Who are these nincompoops manning the C.E.B?
And since when has Phillip Salvador turned into a one-dimensional, sour-faced, caricaturish actor? Maybe coz he was underemployed for years? He comes out with a single expression on his face from start to finish - he might as well wear a mask to save him the agony of a transfixed grimace!
Now, the ending (spoilers beware!). Pia turns up to Seth's family gathering with her whole clan in tow, declaring her undying love for the heartbroken Seth. It was nothing but a failed gimmickry that was farcical at best. It unsuccessfully pushed the boundaries of romance, teetering on the vicinity of desperation. But make no mistake, it was neither romantic nor cute. Again, in my book (which took 22 years to write), romance ends with a cute guy wooing the cute girl. Not the other way around!
Now, to the only gem in this otherwise puddle of mud: KC Concepcion! She overflows with a natural instinct and charm that lights up the screen! She is intuitive and formidably competent - way way better than her mother when the latter was April in "Dear Heart" - or her next 10 movies thereafter! In "For the First Time", a movie star is born! It's just too bad that she had to shine in a mediocre movie! Mel Gibson did it in his very first starrer, the Australian teenage flick "Summer City".
Now, what has happened to Joyce Bernal? Why was this story so banal? Doesn't Star Cinema have creative consultants who scrutinize the storyline and the script? Olivia Lamasan? Ricky Lee? Here's more bad news: I watched the evening screening (7:30PM) at the Galleria, cinema 2 (their biggest I believe) and there was no crowd inside. "Caregiver" was almost-full on its FIRST SCREENING on its first day! What gives? But then again, who cares about that observation? I've read somewhere that the film has allegedly earned P15 million already as of 4 PM on its first day! Alleluia!
Would I still recommend this to people? Of course. This is still a must-see movie if only for the fact that this is KC's first movie! This will be remembered and often referred to when KC is at her prime as one of the stellar movie queens in the distant future - like her mom is!
As to my own mother, she forced herself to watch it in SM Davao. My mom is easy to please when it comes to Pinoy movies. She liked most of the Pinoy films she's seen so far, including Sara Geronimo's "Very Special Love". When asked how she liked the movie, she stopped herself to think, then said, "Ah.... ok lang!" And it was the most tentative thing I've heard from my mom!
Santorini moments...
When the loquacious yaya starts spouting invectives, everything that comes out of her mouth doesn't quite translate into anything humorous. In fact, she was my main source of aggravation in the first 15 minutes of the movie. She just wasn't funny! She inspired my violent rages that I began seeing myself wringing her neck, shaking her endlessly until she realizes that her performance was nowhere endearing or amusing. Her character could be a latter-day incarnation of Suzanne Gonzales or Nova Villa who have played the hilarious nanny to many of Sharon Cuneta's early characters. Unfortunately again, Pangilinan doesn't possess the subtlety of the aforementioned actresses. She is as crass as a those MILF characters spouting ideals on peace. LOL. Having said that, let me go back to the movie.
I had high hopes about this movie. It was an "event" that hasn't escaped even my mother who's vacationing in Davao. And like me, she queued to witness this historical event. Me in Galleria, she in SM Davao. We basically know how the story goes: Rich, but hard working girl Pia (KC Concepcion) meets heartbreaker Seth (Richard Gutierrez) while vacationing in Santorini. She despises him like a fatal disease, which amuses the lothario into wooing her overnight. Sparks fly... or I thought it was supposed to.
There was something amiss with their screen pairing. I can't quite pinpoint the culprit. To be honest, I was never enthralled by Richard Gutierrez. Sure, he is "beautiful" - and though I have watched all his cinematic forays, i was never infatuated with him. His beauty is a novelty that's easy to overcome. He never made my toes curl. He just doesn't seem to possess the gravitas that makes leading men compelling - and that is purely personal. I am sure he has made lots of girls dream wild. Not me. I prefer my men "handsome", not "beautiful".
I have to admit though that his television appearances with KC are something to get yourself worked up with. As a couple, they are a perfection. Which begs the question why they didn't quite work onscreen. The answer must lie somewhere in the technicality of cinematic storytelling. This movie was recklessly told in all its mediocrity. It is such a shame, considering they even have to fly to Greece to spice up the formula. Here's another rub: One hour into the movie, the images onscreen start to blur! Their Grecian canvas becomes badly photographed, I could have shot those scenes better with my amateur video cam. It was so bad, it went on for the next 40 minutes or so! Was this partially filmed using a digital camera? Budget constraints maybe? And isn't Star Cinema a reliable source of glossy, flashy, picture-perfect visuals? The answer is obviously "not all the time". Not this time, at least!
Our troubled heroine Pia trades verbal tussle with Seth while in Greece. By stroke of luck, she makes a deal with the devil (Seth, of course). In a day's worth of flirtation, she falls head over heels in love with the cad. Ganun kabilis nawala ang yamot nya sa manlolokong maningibig. What made her change her mind? Simple! Seth pushed her off the jetty and down the aegean seas! Hahaha. As far as I am concerned, if a guy who woos me pushes me to any body of water, not only will I file a criminal case against him, he will also get a kick in the central recesses of his masculinity! I don't get wooed by murderous maneuvers! In my book, it is brutal, not romantic! But hey, it worked, Pia softens up and even accepts a dinner date that night!
Now let me focus on Seth's character who is inadequately threshed out. He has had a long history of "loving" most of Pia's girl friends, so - when did he have the time to actually live in Greece, learn the language - and in the process stamp an idiotic Italian accent to it - then acquire mastership of a tavern? Not only won't he open the guesthouse at the peak of the tourist season, he also kept dating a bevy of ladies. How did he manage to finance himself or his dates? So, in principle, Richard's character is at best, a figment of an extravagantly fertile imagination; a pulp fiction so desirable that you just have to believe sans logic.
Even as the couple gets back to Manila, the situations kept defying rationality: the greek restaurant scene is one of such scene. Allow me to backtrack to Santorini. When Pia's character fails to find a hotel in Greece, she goes back to Seth's tavern. Instead of eating a humble pie, she kept insulting the owner of the house. Didn't she just beg him to take them back? If so, how can she afford to be rude? This is just among a series of mindbenders littering this cinematic event! And yet, this is such a masterpiece that it actually gets a B Rating from the Cinema Evaluations Board! Which makes you think. Who are these nincompoops manning the C.E.B?
And since when has Phillip Salvador turned into a one-dimensional, sour-faced, caricaturish actor? Maybe coz he was underemployed for years? He comes out with a single expression on his face from start to finish - he might as well wear a mask to save him the agony of a transfixed grimace!
Now, the ending (spoilers beware!). Pia turns up to Seth's family gathering with her whole clan in tow, declaring her undying love for the heartbroken Seth. It was nothing but a failed gimmickry that was farcical at best. It unsuccessfully pushed the boundaries of romance, teetering on the vicinity of desperation. But make no mistake, it was neither romantic nor cute. Again, in my book (which took 22 years to write), romance ends with a cute guy wooing the cute girl. Not the other way around!
Now, to the only gem in this otherwise puddle of mud: KC Concepcion! She overflows with a natural instinct and charm that lights up the screen! She is intuitive and formidably competent - way way better than her mother when the latter was April in "Dear Heart" - or her next 10 movies thereafter! In "For the First Time", a movie star is born! It's just too bad that she had to shine in a mediocre movie! Mel Gibson did it in his very first starrer, the Australian teenage flick "Summer City".
Now, what has happened to Joyce Bernal? Why was this story so banal? Doesn't Star Cinema have creative consultants who scrutinize the storyline and the script? Olivia Lamasan? Ricky Lee? Here's more bad news: I watched the evening screening (7:30PM) at the Galleria, cinema 2 (their biggest I believe) and there was no crowd inside. "Caregiver" was almost-full on its FIRST SCREENING on its first day! What gives? But then again, who cares about that observation? I've read somewhere that the film has allegedly earned P15 million already as of 4 PM on its first day! Alleluia!
Would I still recommend this to people? Of course. This is still a must-see movie if only for the fact that this is KC's first movie! This will be remembered and often referred to when KC is at her prime as one of the stellar movie queens in the distant future - like her mom is!
As to my own mother, she forced herself to watch it in SM Davao. My mom is easy to please when it comes to Pinoy movies. She liked most of the Pinoy films she's seen so far, including Sara Geronimo's "Very Special Love". When asked how she liked the movie, she stopped herself to think, then said, "Ah.... ok lang!" And it was the most tentative thing I've heard from my mom!
Santorini moments...
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Had To Be Michael
I was staring at the screen and there he was, my destiny, my boyfriend! He looks intently through the boob tube and, like a dash of arctic shower, my mom pinches my shoulder! And my dashing gentleman disappears like a bubble popping! Don't they call pinching child abuse?
I have been pausing some scenes from a romantic comedy called "It Had To Be You" which starred my ultimate lothario, Michael Vartan! Oi oi oi! The half French hottie has me goo-goo eyed during its whole syrupy run! It sure took him forever to star in a romantic comedy, something that i have been waiting for a fourth of my lifetime already.
In the film, a gorgeous boy meets gorgeous girl (Natasha Henstridge) on the day they were supposed to finalize their wedding preparations. For a whole week, the seemingly contented couple kept bumping into each other all over New York's Central Park, etc. Then they suddenly realize something: make a good guess!
I am so deeply infatuated with my Michael, I hardly care if the story was as predictable as the fact that one day, in the distant future, Sharon Cuneta and Gabby Concepcion will, once again, pair up on screen! Oh gosh! Vartan just makes me blush! The way his forehead furrows into the sexiest of scowl, the way he cocks up a half smile. oooohlala.... ;->
When a rom-com fields an unpretentious story and the simplest of intentions, the goal can't be too hard to achieve. Who cares about predictability and a trite story when you have a pair whose chemistry sparks up the whole Central Park with their charm and beauty? I don't!
I have been pausing some scenes from a romantic comedy called "It Had To Be You" which starred my ultimate lothario, Michael Vartan! Oi oi oi! The half French hottie has me goo-goo eyed during its whole syrupy run! It sure took him forever to star in a romantic comedy, something that i have been waiting for a fourth of my lifetime already.
In the film, a gorgeous boy meets gorgeous girl (Natasha Henstridge) on the day they were supposed to finalize their wedding preparations. For a whole week, the seemingly contented couple kept bumping into each other all over New York's Central Park, etc. Then they suddenly realize something: make a good guess!
I am so deeply infatuated with my Michael, I hardly care if the story was as predictable as the fact that one day, in the distant future, Sharon Cuneta and Gabby Concepcion will, once again, pair up on screen! Oh gosh! Vartan just makes me blush! The way his forehead furrows into the sexiest of scowl, the way he cocks up a half smile. oooohlala.... ;->
When a rom-com fields an unpretentious story and the simplest of intentions, the goal can't be too hard to achieve. Who cares about predictability and a trite story when you have a pair whose chemistry sparks up the whole Central Park with their charm and beauty? I don't!
Sunday, August 3, 2008
very special
Who would have thought!
Here's the pitch. Laida (Sarah Geronimo) finally lands a job as an editorial assistant at a troubled men's magazine. Whaddaya know, her boss is grumpy cutie Miguel (John Lloyd Cruz), whose cut-outs and posters grace every available space in Laida's bedroom. Grumpy cutie meets bubbly lovelorn Laida. Will she be able to tame her grouchy paramour? Raise your hand for the affirmative. Otherwise, you deserve to jump off Mandaluyong Bridge right down to the brackish Pasig River. It's as predictable as the succeeding letters of the alphabet. That is, unless you are illiterate.
But for all its embarassing predictability, the almost-nonexistent chemistry between the 2 leads creeps up from the backdoor and grows on you. Thanks to the infectiously enthusiastic performance of Geronimo and the undeniable appeal of a gorgeous Cruz. It seems there is a premeditated effort to follow on to the formula that made Regine Velasquez a movie star, i.e. with non-ambitious, saccharine-sweet romantic crowd-pleasers. Good news is, Sarah has a more natural vibe about her than the songbird who appeared awkward in her first, say, 7 starrers.
Other than what was mentioned, never for a second did I believe that THAT was a publishing office. If all seemed like a high school class of bumbling dimwits (excluding Joross Gamboa - and only because he is a certified eyecandy who deserves his own romantic comedy LOL).
I love light romantic films. Makes you believe in fairy tales. Makes you think that there's goodness in everyone. Makes you believe that there is a feeling as genuinely pure as L-O-V-E. Makes my toes curl when, as the film closes, the reel couple starts frolicking and laughing in the rain.
Yeah, makes me blush. Who would have thought!
Sarah and John Lloyd say "eeee...!"
Here's the pitch. Laida (Sarah Geronimo) finally lands a job as an editorial assistant at a troubled men's magazine. Whaddaya know, her boss is grumpy cutie Miguel (John Lloyd Cruz), whose cut-outs and posters grace every available space in Laida's bedroom. Grumpy cutie meets bubbly lovelorn Laida. Will she be able to tame her grouchy paramour? Raise your hand for the affirmative. Otherwise, you deserve to jump off Mandaluyong Bridge right down to the brackish Pasig River. It's as predictable as the succeeding letters of the alphabet. That is, unless you are illiterate.
But for all its embarassing predictability, the almost-nonexistent chemistry between the 2 leads creeps up from the backdoor and grows on you. Thanks to the infectiously enthusiastic performance of Geronimo and the undeniable appeal of a gorgeous Cruz. It seems there is a premeditated effort to follow on to the formula that made Regine Velasquez a movie star, i.e. with non-ambitious, saccharine-sweet romantic crowd-pleasers. Good news is, Sarah has a more natural vibe about her than the songbird who appeared awkward in her first, say, 7 starrers.
Other than what was mentioned, never for a second did I believe that THAT was a publishing office. If all seemed like a high school class of bumbling dimwits (excluding Joross Gamboa - and only because he is a certified eyecandy who deserves his own romantic comedy LOL).
I love light romantic films. Makes you believe in fairy tales. Makes you think that there's goodness in everyone. Makes you believe that there is a feeling as genuinely pure as L-O-V-E. Makes my toes curl when, as the film closes, the reel couple starts frolicking and laughing in the rain.
Yeah, makes me blush. Who would have thought!
Sarah and John Lloyd say "eeee...!"
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